Barbecue Sauce Season

Hi again everybody:
Today's blog is going to be about one of the things in life that give me the most pleasure. Barbecue sauce. See, I love summer and everything that comes with it. I love the heat, the sports, the beach, and especially the foods that go along with summer. That means grilled meats, corn on the cob, fresh local fruit and vegetables. Of course, here in the Northeast, there is a very small window for enjoying fresh corn and tomatoes. You only really get a chance to have good locally grown corn and tomatoes (and other vegetables) from the middle of July till MAYBE the end of September. The rest of the time, we get it imported from other states or countries, or you get crappy hothouse stuff.

GRILLED MEAT AND BARBECUE SAUCES
Fortunately, the same is not true for grilling season. As soon as it's no longer freezing till it begins to freeze again, we're grilling. Now I don't delude myself into thinking I'm Bobby Flay. Nor am I interested in getting into grilling stuff to the level he does. But steaks, chicken, and ribs done on the grill are a thing of culinary beauty, in my mind. I've used a variety of methods for seasoning the meat I'm grilling on a certain day. You can MARINTATE, you can do the DRY RUB thing, or you can use BARBECUE SAUCE. There is also the choice of combining any or all of the three. But beware of overkill.

Today, I'm going to talk about Barbecue Sauce. Now in past blogs I've discussed my love of Sweet Baby Ray's Original. This is the sauce I'm presently in love with. It's sweet and tangy and it complements ribs and chicken wonderfully, without taking away from the taste of the meat. Sweet Baby Ray's is available in many grocery chains across the country, so you should have no trouble finding it if you wish to try it. I think you'll be glad you did.

But there are alot of other top-quality sauces out there. One such product comes from one of my favorite Rib chains. Have you ever heard of Sticky Fingers? My buddies and I came across this place in 2005, while on a trip to the Masters golf tournament in Augusta, GA. We stayed in Columbia, SC, and found this great restaurant while looking for a place to eat on our first night. Sticky Fingers offers 5 different kinds of BBQ sauce to have on your ribs or chicken.

• Carolina Classic
• Carolina Sweet
• Memphis Original
• Tennessee Whiskey
• Habanero Hot

You can get a rib sampler platter with all 5 sauces. Each of the first 4 are awesome and should be sampled by everyone who likes BBQ sauce. The Habanero Hot is another matter. The words Hot and Heat don't begin to describe this stuff. I have no problem with spicy foods. And in truth, this sauce has some great, smoky, Habanero flavor. For about 2-3 seconds. After that, you'd better have a way to put out the fire. And don't even try to douse it with water, because hot pepper is not water soluble. You'll need cole slaw, or fries, or ice cream...something with fat. Pal, let me tell you this stuff is Flaming.

Unless you're from the south, you may not have heard of Sticky Fingers. If you'd like to try out their sauces let me recommend you go to http://www.thesaucesite.com and click on Barbecue Sauce. This will bring you to my link for Sticky Fingers, where you can purchase any of their fine products online.

One other site I'd like to suggest you try, if you're at all adventurous, is the Barbecue Store. Again, you can find the link for this site at http://www.thesaucesite.com and click on Barbecue sauce. The link is about halfway down the page. This site has everything from grills and grill parts, to barbecuing woods for your grill or smoker. And of course they have a HUGE selection of rubs and sauces. Just look for The Barbecue Store when visiting The Sauce Site.

DRY RUBS

I use different kinds of Dry Rubs when I grill steak. I'm not big on putting BBQ sauce on steak. So I like to season liberally with a good rub. I first started experimenting with your typical Montreal Steak seasoning. Of course, being the way I am, I was not satisfied with just one kind of mass-produced spice product. So Now I just make my own using whatever I happen to have on hand. Salt, pepper, granulated garlic (not powder) are 3 of my staples. I like Emeril's Original or Bayou Blast. I also like ground Cayenne pepper.

Your best bet when making your own rub is to experiment. Assuming you keep alot of different spices on hand, the thing to do is to just start mixing. Take a small bowl or tea cup and just start throwing stuff in. Use spices that you are fond of and build from there. Spread a very thin coat of mustard or olive oil on your steak. Then spread your rub mixture on both sides and gently massage the steak, making sure to keep both sides coated. Refrigerate.

ONE CAVEAT TO GRILLING STEAK--Any grilling or barbecuing book you read will tell you that before you put the steaks on the grill it is best to take the steaks out of the fridge for while before grilling and letting them get to room temperature. This, I think, ensures that the steaks stay their juiciest during the cooking process and doesn't "shock" the meat with the quick and severe change in temperature.

As i always say...Don't be afraid to experiment. You'll be surprised at what great flavors you can discover. And as you all know....LEN IS RIGHT.

Till next time, I am Len Tollerton

MY GRATITUDE AND MY APOLOGIES

Just an add-on to today's previous post. While reading through some other blogs, both on blogspot and other blog groups, it has come to my attention that my blogs are WAY TOO LONG. And though my blog is obviously the most pertinent of any blog out there, I would like to apologize to those of you who sit through my wind bag endless rants when they are posted.

And though I know YOU KNOW that LEN IS RIGHT, I will try to scale back my rants to something that can be read inside of one to two minutes.

I appreciate everyone indulging me and apologize again for the length (when will I ever be able to say those words?)

LEN IS RIGHT. LEN IS RIGHT. LEN IS RIGHT.

READ ON, MacDUFF!!

WHY I HATE ORGANIZED RELIGION

Hey World, what's up?
My last post had to do with the U.S. Open. I never mentioned the winner's name, which is Geoff Ogilvy. He did what he had to at the end, and sat by as the last two groups gagged on the last hole, to back into the title. I think you'll be hearing alot more from this Aussie youngster. But that's not what I want to talk about today.

OKAY SATAN, WHY DO YOU HATE RELIGION?
Simply stated folks, I hate organized religion because it has become the root of alot of the evil in our world today. I know you think this might just be about Islam-bashing, but read on. I will get to the Muslims in time. But I think I'll start right at home.

THE ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH
I grew up a Catholic, went to a Catholic elementery school till 4th grade, sent my kids to a Catholic school for a while, and occasionally still attend Catholic church services, but only for Christmas and to be with the family. My problems with the Catholic church stem from the hoarding of wealth, and the need to hold people down with some of their foolish rules. What is a foolish rule? No meat on Fridays during Lent (why?) Get your baby baptized right away, cause if it dies it won't go to heaven. (c'mon, will ya?) You're not allowed to receive Communion unless you go to Confession (now called Reconciliation). Do you think Jesus would deny someone a meal, just because they didn't apologize for their sins? Please.

I recently saw a picture of Pope Benedict. He was dressed in red shoes, a gold lame outer robe, a high "House of Whoville" hat and a "fabulous" ceremonial walking stick or shepherd's hook...I don't know. He'll dress like that, but doesn't want people to see or read The Da Vinci Code because he thinks it'll make people think strangely about the Church. He has no tolerance for gays, but dresses like a radical drag queen with archaic and UNREALISTIC beliefs.

But as long as we give the Church our money, we can get into heaven. Toe the line and you will be saved. Isn't this why Martin Luther broke with the church in the 1500's?

JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES, BORN-AGAIN CHRISTIANS, AND ANY OTHER FUNDAMENTALIST CHRISTIAN NEO-RIGHT WING ORGANIZATION THAT PROFESSES TO KNOW IT ALL
First, the Jehovahs. Dude, 144,000 people are all God is accepting into heaven? The rest will either be born again to live on the planet, or stay dead in their graves (if you don't accept Jesus as your personal savior)? You holier than thou snobbish bastards. I'll bet you the million dollars that I don't have that NONE of the Jehovahs I know, or know of, are on the guest list. "C'mon Marge, it's our turn to get into heaven. We've both been exemplary Jehovahs all of our lives. There must be room for us. What??!! What do you mean we can't get in? I prayed and built 5 Kingdom Halls myself! I never acknowledged Christmas, Easter, or my, or anyone else's birthday, and never sang a song for pleasure. I deserve a spot next to the Father, dammit! Oh shit, I didn't mean to say dammit! I meant to say, why me Lord? I thought I was on ther guest list. Ahhh forget it Marge. I guess they lost our Reservation. Now we have to spend eternity alongside the Tollertons. Ahhh shit!!"

This whole rant doesn't just apply to the Jehovahs. It applies to all you condescending, looking-down-your-nose, holding your hand up in the air to Jesus while you sing hymns, know it all, insufferable pains in the ass Born Again Christians and Fundamentalists who think that your intolerance of others who haven't accepted Jesus is what's going to save you in the long run.

Wake up, cause here's The Message from Jesus. Live in Peace. Love Your Fellow Man (person for PC-ness). You think you have all the answers and that you know what He would say. What Would Jesus Do? Who Knows? I can tell you he probably wouldn't be practicing Intolerance of any kind. Do you think he's going to send all Buddhists, Jews, Hindus, and Muslims to hell? Some of each group probably deserve it, but I doubt the majority do, just because they haven't accepted Jesus into their lives. Crackuh Puhhleeez.

MUSLIMS AND THE ISLAMIC PEOPLE OF THE WORLD
Look folks, we know you're not all like the terrorists of the world. We know that the VAST majority just want to live in peace, enjoy their lives, raise their children without the probability of horrific violent death just like the rest of the Western world. Most of us in America realize that the people in our country go over the top with the way we act. Too much consumtion of food, gas, alcohol, drugs, entertainment, freedom. We can understand why many other nations hate our country. We know you just want to respect the Koran, and observe your own religious practices.

But tell me, WHY DOES EVERYONE IMMIGRATE TO AMERICA? Because here, you have the freedom to be whomever you want to be. You can own a bodega, you can watch TV, you can go to school wherever you want, you can take care of your family, you can practice your religion. How many Americans leave to move to other countries?

In the Islamic faith there are many different sects that claim to be the one true way. The Shiites, the Sunnis, etc...ad nauseum. They believe if they kill the Infidel they'll be guaranteed a place in heaven and be given 72 virgins to spend eternity with. Hey guys... guess what....any man that wants to hang out with 72 women everyday is either gay, deaf, or has a death wish. C'mon dude. 72 virgins? Chances are all 72 of them are fat, toothless and don't bathe on a regular basis. Jeez, Allah, sign me up for that. I want decadence in heaven with women who refuse to bathe or shave (the reason why they're virgins), instead of some gorgeous blonde, with a body that moves mountains, and has a plan for personal hygiene right here on Earth. Terrorist for what reason? Get Real!

THE JEWS
No offense folks, but let's face it. You've got ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT. You've got most of the wealth. You control most of the entertainment, sports and banking worlds. None of you are destitute. You've never been poor. You've never been persecuted. At least no one who has lived in the last 100 years in America. Oh sure, your ancestors were kept down. You didn't have your own homeland till 1948 (Israel), or the 1920's if you consider Hollywood, Long Island, and Miami (until the Hispanics took over a few years ago). Now you have a monopoly on most of the rest of Florida.

And still you bitch about EVERYTHING. My food's not right. Mel Gibson's movie made us look bad (please, it made Italians look worse). I can't get good coffee. My son married a Gentile. Who shops at Wal Mart? Oh, we can't let our kids hang out with Asians. Yada-yada-yada. Shut up and try getting along with the rest of us without hoarding EVERYTHING! You don't need to own the whole world. You can't take it with you. And your kids are probably going to put it up their nose or spend it on a (Ethnicity of your choice) stripper. How 'bout playing nice and getting along, huh?

THE BUDDHISTS
Have you ever met a violent, complaining, holier-than-thou, snobbish, pain-in-the-ass Buddhist? No. I didn't think so. Peace, harmony, happiness, and love are what real Buddhists are about. They worship the Earth and things in nature around them.

Those people I respect. If I was to bring myself to join an organized religion, it would be the Buddhists. You want to know where REAL POWER comes from? Look down. You're standing on it. The Earth, people. It's the only real, tangible, unstoppable force you need be concerned with. Did God or Allah, or Jesus or Siva, or any of the other deities send the earthquakes, floods, hurricanes, tornadoes, tsunamis, blizzards, heat waves, or humidity? NO! NO! NO! The power of the Earth sent it all to you. The planet does what it wants. It pays no attention to God or Satan. And there's not thing one any of you out there can do about it. When the planet belches lava, or cracks and swallows half a city along with 100,000 people, or Katrina storms and destroys New Orleans, do you think that was Sodom and Gomorrah? Afraid not folks. It was just the Planet Earth reminding us who is Boss. Mother Earth.

I know this because.....LEN IS RIGHT, dammit. I invite your comments.
Please click on the new links I have posted and visit my sponsors. There's alot of quality stuff there. Also, check out The Sauce Site for some great add-ons to all your meals.
http://www.thesaucesite.com

I am,
Len Tollerton
Thanks for visiting and reading my rant.

THE U.S. OPEN REPORT

Hello everyone:
Well, we made it back Friday, after a VERY long day at the U.S. Open. I hope everyone had a fun Father's Day and were able to get full use out of the warm, sunny weather we had over the weekend.

THE 106th U.S. OPEN FROM WINGED FOOT
Okay here's the journal of the day as it went on Friday. The guys showed up at my house at 5:10 a.m. We stopped at a local roadside diner for breakfast (the pancakes were the biggest I've ever seen, covering the ENTIRE plate.

We ate pretty quickly and set out. As we were approaching the NYS Thruway, Roy asks the Palooka if he has the tickets. Palooka says, "Oh shit, I left them home." So we make a detour to Palooka's house, and pick up the tickets. Okay, now we can set out. We make a leisurely 2 hour drive to Westchester Community College and park the car. Then it's on to the metal detector area. Let me tell ya, these folks left no stone unturned, don't ya know. The magnetic, handheld wands picked up the slightest bit of metal you may have had in your pocket. The stopped my for having a dime and nickel in one pocket and the aluminum foil paper that was in my cigarette pack. These people were serious....no smiles.

We then got on shuttle buses and drove for another half-hour, during which the Palooka bitched the entire time about how stupidly this system was set up. We finally got on the grounds around 10:00 a.m. After watching a few groups that were playing on adjacent holes, we began to move around the course.

CONDITIONS AT WINGED FOOT
I'd like to describe the conditions of the course very quickly, for those of you who have never been to a major tournament. First off, the fairways. If you were to picture a really thick, coarse, carpet-like piece of felt, that would describe the fairways. Really, it was like hitting off of indoor/outdoor carpeting, with a padding underneath.

The bunkers were large and somewhat trecherous, but the edges were cut so sharp that you may have been able to tear your pants on them. The greens, of course, were gorgeous, well-maintained, and VERY fast. Oh, and undulating. Not too many dead-flat areas. The crowd was polite and friendly. Then, of course there was...................

THE ROUGH AT WINGED FOOT
If you thought you were a frustrated hacker, you had to see the pro's going out of their minds over this rough. So you say, "Big Deal," rough is rough...it's just long grass. That's what I thought until I actually felt the grass. Normally, if you put your hand down into 5-6 inch-long grass it just moves around with no problem. Here at Winged Foot, I never felt anything like this. Picture, if you will, putting your hands into a large box of rubber bands. Your fingers slide in w/ no problem and immdiately get tangled up and you have to work on removing them. As you walk along, your sneaker treads get caught up in the grass. So you can see, especially if you watched the tournament on TV, why the pro's were only able to advance the ball a short distance when they were unlucky enough to get buried in the rough. I think you may have been able to find alot of lost items in the rough.

We were disappointed that Tiger Woods was rusty after his long layoff. He was never a factor and, indeed, missed his first cut, ever, in a major. We saw some nice shots, but only mediocre putting. The temperature hovered around 85 all day. Beers were $5 and $6, and the most expensive food item was $7 (a chicken Caesar wrap). Basically, we walked around, ate and drank all day, while trying to find places in the shade that would give us a good view of the action on the greens.

We finally got back to the car at around 8:00 p.m. (that after spending $154 on overpriced stuff in the Merch Tent). After a cold beer or two, we got back on the highway. Things were going great until we got a few miles north of Poughkeepsie where we came to a dead stop. There had been a serious accident up ahead. So serious, in fact, that they had to bring in a helicopter to take away the injured. We found out later that a 9-year-old was killed. So we sat for 2 1/2 hours until everything was cleaned up. We got back to my house at 1:45 a.m., almost 21 hours after we had left.

THE LEN IS RIGHT TAKE ON THE U.S. OPEN
I was hoping Colin Montgomerie, Steve Stricker, or Phil Mickelson would win on Sunday. After a tremendous birdie putt on the 17th hole, Monty faded on 18 with a double-bogey. Mickelson proceded to have one of the greatest mental meltdowns in history giving away the lead and the title over the last 3 holes. Very un-Phil-like. He will probably beat himself up over this for a while, and he should. He made inexcusable mistakes that cost him his 3rd Major title in a row. But this is what makes the U.S. Open so tough to win and so appreciated for years afterward.

All in all, it was a fun, tiring, long day. If this tournament is played in a location near where you live, and you like golf, by all means go and be a spectator at the U.S. Open The rough was CRAZY, do you hear me? The greens were slick and very undulating, and I'm sure it was an exercise in frustration for most of the golfers. I think if I had played the same conditions, I may have carded a 145. But only if I hit 80% of the fairways. If I'm in the rough, all bets are off.

Happy belated Father's Day to all of those out there who have begat heirs. Until next time, remember that LEN IS RIGHT.

I am,
Len Tollerton

THE U.S. OPEN AND THE N.Y. METS

My very good friends:
I return to post the night before the big pilgrimage to Winged Foot for the 2nd round of the U.S. Open. I have also returned to turn the screws a little tighter, whether it brings the jinx, or not.

THE U.S. OPEN AT WINGED FOOT
There's not much to say here, folks. The course just laid waste to the pro's and made them look like a bunch of us guys. Was that beautiful, or what? I mean, I probably would have carded a 145. But one guy under par? One stinkin' guy? Oh, the words that come to mind......Precious.....Sweet.....Gnarly, dude......How'd that feel? I hope I don't get any tick bites wading through the 5 to 8 inch rough tomorrow. Jesus, we might be able to find Hoffa and Amelia Earhart if we look good enough.

Do you think the members of Winged Foot let the children who live in the surrounding area go sledding on the greens in winter time? Perhaps the U.S. Olympic ski team could practice moguls and the downhill around the greens areas. Maybe Bode Miller could show up for a medal next Olympics if he were to practice at Winged Foot. Jeez, it could only bring in more membership dues money for the club, right? "I say, Harriet, is that man snow boarding off the 10th green?"
"Why yes, Reginald, I believe he's pulling a 540 tail grab with an Ollie."
"Oh Harriet, talk like that some more, I believe my member moved."
" Oh, Dahling."

Look for me, Roy, Chuck, and the Palooka on TV tomorrow as we will be the ones knuckle deep in our noses when the camera pans by as Tiger (a 6-over 76 and 7 shots back of Monty after Round 1) pulls out his new Titleist Machete Iron to negotiate a particularly tough lie on the 16th, hoping to make the cut as the sun begins to set. Soccer hooligans, my arse!!
http://www.usopen.com

THE NEW YORK METS
Oh, how sweet it is! Yeah, it may be too early to crow, but we might as well be 1986-style pains in the asses while we can. The rest of the National League, the Eastern Division especially, can just kiss our ass right now. I think we may have already clinched a Wild-Card spot (barring injury of course). It is June 15, and the Metropolitans are 9.5 games up on the 2nd place Phillies. And when, my friends, when was the last time the Mets had a 12 game lead on the HATED Braves from Atlanta? I hope the fans in Atlanta remember what it was like when Sherman came through during the War Between the States. Burn you mofo's, burn.

Hey, how're them Yankees looking right now, huh? I'd say they're looking old. Let me hear it people...."SWEEEEET." The Baltmur Oreos come to town to try to cool down the Mets over this weekend. It's been a long time coming. If I was in the stands I'd begin a European Soccer Fan chant in the stands. "Oh, We Play Hard! We give Our All! So You Can Kiss Our Bats And Kiss Our Balls!" THAT, my friends, would be the highlight to my baseball season. To hear the whole crowd at a Mets game singing like a Eurpoe soccer crowd, the words I've just written.....why I could die a happy man. LET'S GO METS!!

You can follow the goings on in baseball at: http://www.mlb.com

Well, folks, it's off to bed for your ranting blog master, as I have a 5:00 a.m. departure time. Enjoy the sunny, warm weekend. Please remember that Len Is Right.
Cause I am,
Len Tollerton

FIELD DAY AT SCHOOL AND THE WORLD CUP

Good Day my friends.
I'm hoping this post finds everyone doing well and starting to enjoy the summer. The rain looks like it's starting to ebb and we may get some decent weather up in the great Northeast. At least for the next few days.

FIELD DAY AT THE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL
Today my son Jackson's school held their annual Field Day. This consists of all the classes broken into 4 teams each, and competing in 12 different events. Parents were enlisted to man the different stations and set-up food, water slide, and a host of other fun activities. I was stationed at the Tug-Of-War. We all had a great time cheering everyone on and making sure everyone had fun. I tried to make sure that all the kids were into it, but were not so competitive that they had hard feelings after losing. It turned out really well, though I was a tad hoarse afterward. I DID almost suffer a broken finger when one lovely 3rd grade girl, angry over her team's loss, tried to twist my fingers off when I went around giving everyone high-fives. Is this how soccer hooligans get their start? Or maybe youth sports parents who want to beat up coaches? "Honey, honey, you're breaking my finger!!! This is just for fun, no need to injure the nice volunteer."

THE WORLD CUP
I just got done watching a thrilling match between Poland and Germany. Germany won in Overtime, 1-0, on a late goal, with Poland a man down because of a red-card penalty. This game was played in Dortmund, Germany, in the largest soccer venue in that country. There were 67,000 screaming fans, most pulling for the home team, though Poland was well-represented in the stands.

As most of us know, the U.S. team was embarassed by the Czechs, 3-0 in the flattest, most uninspired performance I think our national team has ever put out. It's like we have all these hopes that this World Cup will finally be the one where we gain some respect in the world soccer community. As usual, we showed why our national sport is baseball. I, personally, have never been a big fan of soccer, though I will give it a try every once in a while. Today's Poland/Germany game was fast-paced and actually interesting to watch.

The one thing I dearly love about watching soccer or rugby in frome Europe, or Australian rules football from down-under is listening to the fans sing fight songs throughout the game. I mean, you may think that college football or basketball fans are rabid. You may think the Cheese-heads up in Green Bay or the redneck Nascar fans are the most ardent followers of their respective teams. But you haven't seen anything till you've seen and heard a European soccer or rugby crowd sing for, scream for, cheer for and harrass the teams playing on the field of those games. You never see national pride like you do during the World Cup. And though the "hooligans" get out of hand at times, Americans can only hope to show the outright passion of these maniacs who genuinely live and die with the outcome of their city's or country's games. It is a refreshing departure from some American sports crowds (like the Florida Marlins and their 6.700 fans that showed up at Dolphins Stadium the other night). Even if a European team sucks and is in last place, the stands are still full and their fans are still as boisterous as if they were leading the Division. Cheers to all of them. If the Americans ever field a team that gets to a Final or wins the World Cup, we had all better just prepare for the coming of Armageddon, because the world will surely come to an end when that happens. Visit all the goings on at:
http://www.fifaworldcup.com

THE U.S. OPEN
Yeah, baby!! I am off to the U.S, Open on Friday!!! Our national golf championship is taking place in Westchester County at the Famed Winged Foot Golf Club. I'm going with my friends Roy (the G.B. King), Chuck (the Edge of Darkness), and Jeff (the Big Palooka). We will be leaving at 5:00 a.m. and making the 2 hour drive to Mamaronek. The four of us went to the Masters in 2005 and the chance to actually be present for the U.S. Open is a chance we can't pass up. The 3 of them attended U.S. Opens at Shinnecock and at Bethpage Black on Long Island when they were played there over the last few years. This will be my first Open and I'm stoked. If I remember, I'll try to pick you all up a ball marker. You can check out all the goings on at the U.S.Open at: http://www.usopen.com

LEN IS RIGHT.....but....
as stated in a previous post, I SUCK at handicapping horse races. The horses I picked for the Belmont Stakes didn't finish in the money. But see, what DOES make Len Right is that I'm smart enough to know that I suck at handicapping, thus I DON"T BET.
The moral...A man's got to know his limitations.

HOW ABOUT A NEW CROCK POT OR SOME GREAT WINE?
Okay, it's shameless shill time here at Len Is Right. I'd like to point your attention to the right to the link section and ask you to check out the links to Crock Pot.com and Wines Direct.com

I don't know how many of you own or have used a crock pot for slow cooking, but they work really well and are really versatile. If you haven't checked them out before, or in a while, take a look at all the different kinds and sizes there are now. They even come in different themes (Nascar and other decorations) and there is even a table-top BBQ model, which looks really interesting.

Also, i know you wine lovers out there usually just go to the local liquor store for your favorite vino. But if you get the chance, take a look at the link for WinesDirect.com. You may find something that you haven't tried before.

Okay, that's all for now. Thanks for reading and I hope everyone has a great weekend. Look for me on TV on Friday afternoon. I'll be wearing my white Universal Studios hat, cheering Tiger Woods and the rest of the competitors (except Vijay Singh) at the U.S.Open. GOING TO THE OPEN, BABY!!!

Of course, Len Is Right.
I am,
Len Tollerton

WHAT'S UP PEOPLE!

Len Is Right is back again with a new post. It's been a few days since my last post and I've got just a few short notes, Larry King-style, to put out, just so you don't forget about me.

THE KID FROM BROOKLYN
First off, I'd like to point you to an interesting website www.thekidfrombrooklyn.com Folks, if you click on this website and go to the video page, you'll get a kick out of what you hear. The big man in the videos is this guy, Mike, who loves to go on these 1-2 minute rants on just about any topic out there. One Warning: He does use a bit of profanity, so don't watch them around the kids, okay? This guy makes me laugh, especially when he gets out of breath. He's right on with alot of his views, in my opinion, and usually makes me chuckle for a few minutes. Check him out, but beware, he's loud.

TONY'S KNEE SURGERY
Our good friend, Tony Sansone, had a scope on his knee yesterday to clean up his torn meniscus cartiledge. Now, I know about knee surgery, having undergone ACL reconstruction back in '95. A scope isn't really too bad, especially with today's technology. A major reconstruction is, obviously, alot tougher because it is invasive and you need to reeducate your muscles in that area. Rehab can take around 6 months depending on how stringent you are about going to therapy. The more you do, the faster you are back in action.

I'd also like to relate one of the really bad things about knee injuries. If you end up getting fluid in your knee and it becomes difficult to bend it, the doctor usually suggests getting the knee drained. Well I'm here to tell you that the ONLY good thing about getting your knee drained is the end result, the ability to bend your knee and walk normally again. Let me explain the procedure and why I hate it. First, they have to numb your knee. The way they do this is by sticking a novocaine-filled needle into the center of your knee. They usually have you hold onto a pillow while they do this, because it flat-out hurts. And unlike other surface-based pain, this pain is in the center of your knee and there's no way for you to rub it to ease the pain. That's the worst. Next, they take an even bigger needle with a fat syringe on it and stick that into the center of your knee, and start draining fluid. As the syringe fills up, there is some relief. That is, until the syringe is full and they have to get a new one. While they change syringes, they leave the needle in your knee and everytime they do something, the needle moves around inside your knee. There might be novocaine in there, but it still hurts and it's very disconcerting feeling something sharp moving around in the center of your knee. Finally, it's over and you get down off the table and take your first few ginger steps. Ahhh, now you can bend your knee. Hopefully your knee won't swell up again and you have to get it drained again.

THE KEY TO SUCCESSFUL KNEE REHAB
There are many factors that go into successfully rehabbing one's knee. Being serious about your therapy regimen is a must. However, the MAJOR key to survivng this whole ordeal is one word. ICE .
Ice is a must. It is your best friend at the end of your therapy session. It is a necessity every day after walking around. Ice will keep the swelling down and the need for another draining kept to a minimum. Anyway, we here at Len Is Right would like to wish a speedy recovery to Tony Sansone. I know he's going to be itching to get back into the gym and back to work laying ties for the America's railroad.

THE BELMONT STAKES
This seems to be an anti-climax after the Derby winner broke his leg and Preakness winner, Bernadini, is passing on this race. Of the 12 horses entered, it seems that only 5 are given much of a chance. Right now, I'm seeing alot of press on Sunriver and High Finance. The opening line had Bluegrass Cat (2nd in the Derby) as the early favorite. I think his Derby result was a fluke. Steppenwolfer is a very late closer and supposedly has never had to deal with this long of a race. Will he be there at the end. I have absolutely no idea here, so I'm just going to throw an Exacta Box pick out there for you. High Finance and Steppenwolfer. Good Luck.

STARS I'VE SEEN ENOUGH OF FOR A WHILE
The following is a list of people whose faces I could go at least 5 years and not see, and it would be okay with me. Overexposure has just made me tired of them. Feel free to chime in with your votes.

• Paris Hilton and her balloon-headed ex-friend Nicole Richie
• Brangelina--Does anyone really care where Brad and his screwball girlfriend have their baby? Go away already.
• Barry Bonds and anything to do with steroids.
• Jessica Simpson
• Lindsay Lohan
• Tom Cruise--no psychotherapy needed there, huh? Why does Katie Holmes always look scared yet sedated?
• Dubya--How fast can the next election come?
• Protesters of the Da Vinci Code---get a freakin' life.
• Nick Lachey, Ryan Seacrest, and the rest of the self-promoter useless talking heads in the world.
• The Gyllenhall (spelling?) family...Jake and Maggie, you are a couple of creepy looking people. Please stop our nightmares.
• James Blunt--"You're Beautiful" No you're not...you suck.
• Mischa Barton--please
• Rain in the Northeast. This summer is shaping up to be a loser. Where is the sun?

Okay folks, we've about made it to the end of the schoolyear and half-days start next week. Get ready parents. Get those vacation plans set and enjoy. This is truly the best time of the year. Get yourselves outside and have some fun.

Peace to all. Talk to you soon. As always....Len Is Right. A motto. A Credo. A way of Life.

I am Len Tollerton

FINALLY BACK WITH SOME TOPICS

Hello all:
Welcome back. I apologize for not posting since May 27. Time constraints and writers block again. On Friday June2, I played in an all-inclusive golf outing with 3 of my closest golfing buddies. The outing was a scramble format with a shotgun start. If you've played in one of these, you know it is designed to give everyone a chance at maikng a contribution to the team. It's alot of fun and can end up being pretty competitive.

THE PRINTERS' OUTING AT ORCHARD CREEK
I've got to tell you about this outing because it was truly the classiest, well-planned, and well-run outings I've ever played in. First off, we checked in at 8:00 a.m. We all received a sleeve of balls and were able to buy-in to a 50/50 raffle. We then went into the clubhouse and enjoyed a complimentary breakfast of coffee, juice, danish fresh-fruit, etc.... At 9:00 we all went out to our starting holes (there were 120-140 golfers, ergo a shotgun start), and proceded to try to get a jump on the rest of the field. My group started at a 145-yd Par 3. Our closest tee shot came within 11 feet. Not bad, but not close enough to win one of the closest-to-the-pin contests. The putt was makeable, but we weren't able to grab the birdie with 4 attempts. This was a true omen for how our day would go. One of our team, Dot-Com Destroyer, is a solid 6 handicap, and it was pretty much the Dot-Com show most of the day. Yours truly can crank out drives in the 240-280-yd. range. But this guy, who is about 3 inches shorter and 80-100 lbs. lighter just blows the ball past me. Our other 2 partners, the G. B. King and The Edge of Darkness were playing injured (one with a 2 inch gash on his thumb, the other playing for the 1st time after fairly serious back surgery in the late winter).

We got hot over the last 7 holes and were able to card a 6-under par 65. On the course we were playing, Orchard Creek in Altamont, N.Y., we thought that would, at least, be good enough for 2nd place prize money. More on that later.

When we came off the course after 10 holes (the turn), it was lunch time. We were pleasantly surprised to see hot dogs, sausage sandwiches and grilled ribs, along with all the water, soda, and beer you wanted. There were also kegs going out on the course, in case anyone felt a tad dehydrated. After chowing down, we made our way back onto the course to finish the last 8 holes of our round. We did okay, but not as well as we expected. We didn't get our approach shots close enough to the holes, we didn't chip the ball particularly well, and we missed FAR TOO MANY putts. If you don't give yourself a chance to make short putts, and can't sink the 10-20 footers with 4 chances, you're not going to win a scramble. We had a great day, however, laughing and goofing around, so the golf was kind-of secondary.

After golf, the outing moved a few miles down the road to Pickard's Grove, which sits at the base of the mountain below Thatcher Park (a famous state park in upstate NY). This place is one of those classic clam-bake locations, with indoor/outdoor tables, horseshoe pits, large bar, clam bars, etc... This place was clean, the staff was very friendly, there was plenty of room, and the food was great. Food? Hot dogs, sausage, clam chowder, raw clams and oysters (as much as you could eat...and I can pound the raw bar, let me tell ya), chips and salsa, cheese and crackers, bevarages. That was for the first 3 hours.

THE AWESOMELY GREAT SUCKOUT ON THE G.B.KING (ROY LUCE)

During that time the four of us amused ourselves with a couple of $20 Hold-'Em tournaments. After 2 major suck-outs, I was able to send GBK and Edge O D packing, leaving me and the Dot-Com Destroyer to battle it out for the money. Less than 5 hands later, it was over and I was the winner. The suckout I pulled on GBK, with a suited 10-3 in my hand, was a thing of beauty as a 3 and a 10 came on the board to knock out his lower 2-pair, which he caught early on. Definitely a questionable call after GBK went All-In, but my mind was on glomming some more raw clams and my stomach made my decision for me. When I sucked-out the winning hand, GBK was left to run for drinks, shaking his head and talking to himself all the way. I believe he was seeing black at this point. If he hadn't been knocked out at that point, he would have certainly gone on TILT and busted out soon after. A second tournament found me and GBK battling it out at the end for the money, and the tables were turned as he pulled a 3rd seven on the river when CLEARLY dominated by my A-J and 2 pair. Paybacks can indeed be a bitch. But it was fun.

My only complaint of the day was the stalls in the Men's room at the Grove. When you sat down, the door was right against your knees. It made it a little tough to do your business. But what was worse was when I stood up and had to pull my pants back on. I couldn't bend over or I would have hit my head on the door and fallen backward onto the toilet. So, here I am, trying to get into Limbo dancing position to grab my underwear and pants and get myself back out to the festivities. I'm lucky I didn't pull a muscle in my back trying to get to my dropped pants.

Anyway......at 6:30, out came the dinner. Some got steak, some got lobster, plus 1 1/2 dozen steamed clams (as if I hadn't had enough clams already). While we were eating they gave out 10 50/50 cash prizes, and the awards for the winning teams and the four closest to the pin and 2 men's and women's longest drive contests. The winning team ended up shooting 12-Under 59! A great score to be sure, but on a tough course like that, they either were knocking down alot of putts, or cheating their asses offf. When 2nd place was announced with a 9-Under and 3rd was 8-Under, we realized that we just didn't play well enough. I'm sure all 3 teams didn't cheat their way to those scores, so they must have played alot better than us. I happened to win a closest-to-the-pin for the 6th hole (3 ft. 2 in) and won a $25 gift card to the golf course. After this they gave away about 30 smaller prizes, which included a grill, a cordless drill, a screened tent, a huge cooler and stand, and a host of other neat stuff. Then they gave away the big prizes, which included a 20" LCD flat screen TV, a DVD/VCR combo, and a digital camera.

After that we left because we were tired, full, and didn't want to play anymore cards. We were a little disappointed that we didn't come in to the money as a team. But we all had a great time, alot of laughs and a terrific day overall. It's good to golf with your friends. Thanks to Chuck "The Edge Of Darkness" Luce, my brother, for inviting me to the outing. I hope it will grow to be a tradition.

A COUPLE OF FINAL POINTS

• The NY Mets are still in first place (Hear that Mrs. Koehler?)
• I will soon have a Fantasy Football Directory site up and running with articles and opinions. You can see it at www.thefantasyfootballpicks.com , but it's not fully ready yet. I hope some of my friends will post their fantasy opinions on the site when I get everything ready.
• My wife, Patty, and I went to see the Da Vinci Code last week. She had read the book and I hadn't. I knew the premise and went in with an open mind. I was glued to the edge of my seat for 2 1/2 hours. What a great murder mystery and story. Whether you buy-in to the idea or not, it's a great movie. I wouldn't watch it again, however, because once all of the shocking turns and twists are revealed, there's no surprise anymore. Kind of like watching M. Night Shamawhatever's Sixth Sense.
• I am OFFICIALLY tired of rain. Things are saturated around here.
• I thought Over The Hedge was cute, but not great.
• I find a chunky Brittany Spears alot more attractive than a Paris Hilton or Nicole ("how do you like my huge head and skinny body?) Ritchie.
• I'm rooting for the Dallas Mavericks because I'm a Dirk Nowitzki fan, although I HATE the NBA.
• I listen to Mike and Mike in the Morning every weekday morning on ESPN radio.
• We are in the process of planning a LARGE 20th anniversary party for our yard in August. You had better hope you're on the invite list. We are taking applications for a lottery-type approval list now.
• Projects for this summer (if it stops raining) are painting the outside foundation of my house, painting the shed in the backyard, pressure-washing the house, and selling my 2-family house in Waterford (it's on the market now).
• Right now I'm using charcoal to grill with instead of gas. It takes a bit longer, but to me the taste is worth it.

That's all for now folks. I really need to sit down and write more often. I'm sorry if you're a regular reader and I've been neglecting you over the last week. If there's a topic you'd like me to write about, please submit to me via email or post a comment on this site. Hey Chuck, give me something REAL to sink my writing teeth into. Anyone else?

Just don't be offended by my take on things, because you know...LEN IS RIGHT.

Thanks to all my readers.

I am Len Tollerton