Sunday, June 04, 2006

FINALLY BACK WITH SOME TOPICS

Hello all:
Welcome back. I apologize for not posting since May 27. Time constraints and writers block again. On Friday June2, I played in an all-inclusive golf outing with 3 of my closest golfing buddies. The outing was a scramble format with a shotgun start. If you've played in one of these, you know it is designed to give everyone a chance at maikng a contribution to the team. It's alot of fun and can end up being pretty competitive.

THE PRINTERS' OUTING AT ORCHARD CREEK
I've got to tell you about this outing because it was truly the classiest, well-planned, and well-run outings I've ever played in. First off, we checked in at 8:00 a.m. We all received a sleeve of balls and were able to buy-in to a 50/50 raffle. We then went into the clubhouse and enjoyed a complimentary breakfast of coffee, juice, danish fresh-fruit, etc.... At 9:00 we all went out to our starting holes (there were 120-140 golfers, ergo a shotgun start), and proceded to try to get a jump on the rest of the field. My group started at a 145-yd Par 3. Our closest tee shot came within 11 feet. Not bad, but not close enough to win one of the closest-to-the-pin contests. The putt was makeable, but we weren't able to grab the birdie with 4 attempts. This was a true omen for how our day would go. One of our team, Dot-Com Destroyer, is a solid 6 handicap, and it was pretty much the Dot-Com show most of the day. Yours truly can crank out drives in the 240-280-yd. range. But this guy, who is about 3 inches shorter and 80-100 lbs. lighter just blows the ball past me. Our other 2 partners, the G. B. King and The Edge of Darkness were playing injured (one with a 2 inch gash on his thumb, the other playing for the 1st time after fairly serious back surgery in the late winter).

We got hot over the last 7 holes and were able to card a 6-under par 65. On the course we were playing, Orchard Creek in Altamont, N.Y., we thought that would, at least, be good enough for 2nd place prize money. More on that later.

When we came off the course after 10 holes (the turn), it was lunch time. We were pleasantly surprised to see hot dogs, sausage sandwiches and grilled ribs, along with all the water, soda, and beer you wanted. There were also kegs going out on the course, in case anyone felt a tad dehydrated. After chowing down, we made our way back onto the course to finish the last 8 holes of our round. We did okay, but not as well as we expected. We didn't get our approach shots close enough to the holes, we didn't chip the ball particularly well, and we missed FAR TOO MANY putts. If you don't give yourself a chance to make short putts, and can't sink the 10-20 footers with 4 chances, you're not going to win a scramble. We had a great day, however, laughing and goofing around, so the golf was kind-of secondary.

After golf, the outing moved a few miles down the road to Pickard's Grove, which sits at the base of the mountain below Thatcher Park (a famous state park in upstate NY). This place is one of those classic clam-bake locations, with indoor/outdoor tables, horseshoe pits, large bar, clam bars, etc... This place was clean, the staff was very friendly, there was plenty of room, and the food was great. Food? Hot dogs, sausage, clam chowder, raw clams and oysters (as much as you could eat...and I can pound the raw bar, let me tell ya), chips and salsa, cheese and crackers, bevarages. That was for the first 3 hours.

THE AWESOMELY GREAT SUCKOUT ON THE G.B.KING (ROY LUCE)

During that time the four of us amused ourselves with a couple of $20 Hold-'Em tournaments. After 2 major suck-outs, I was able to send GBK and Edge O D packing, leaving me and the Dot-Com Destroyer to battle it out for the money. Less than 5 hands later, it was over and I was the winner. The suckout I pulled on GBK, with a suited 10-3 in my hand, was a thing of beauty as a 3 and a 10 came on the board to knock out his lower 2-pair, which he caught early on. Definitely a questionable call after GBK went All-In, but my mind was on glomming some more raw clams and my stomach made my decision for me. When I sucked-out the winning hand, GBK was left to run for drinks, shaking his head and talking to himself all the way. I believe he was seeing black at this point. If he hadn't been knocked out at that point, he would have certainly gone on TILT and busted out soon after. A second tournament found me and GBK battling it out at the end for the money, and the tables were turned as he pulled a 3rd seven on the river when CLEARLY dominated by my A-J and 2 pair. Paybacks can indeed be a bitch. But it was fun.

My only complaint of the day was the stalls in the Men's room at the Grove. When you sat down, the door was right against your knees. It made it a little tough to do your business. But what was worse was when I stood up and had to pull my pants back on. I couldn't bend over or I would have hit my head on the door and fallen backward onto the toilet. So, here I am, trying to get into Limbo dancing position to grab my underwear and pants and get myself back out to the festivities. I'm lucky I didn't pull a muscle in my back trying to get to my dropped pants.

Anyway......at 6:30, out came the dinner. Some got steak, some got lobster, plus 1 1/2 dozen steamed clams (as if I hadn't had enough clams already). While we were eating they gave out 10 50/50 cash prizes, and the awards for the winning teams and the four closest to the pin and 2 men's and women's longest drive contests. The winning team ended up shooting 12-Under 59! A great score to be sure, but on a tough course like that, they either were knocking down alot of putts, or cheating their asses offf. When 2nd place was announced with a 9-Under and 3rd was 8-Under, we realized that we just didn't play well enough. I'm sure all 3 teams didn't cheat their way to those scores, so they must have played alot better than us. I happened to win a closest-to-the-pin for the 6th hole (3 ft. 2 in) and won a $25 gift card to the golf course. After this they gave away about 30 smaller prizes, which included a grill, a cordless drill, a screened tent, a huge cooler and stand, and a host of other neat stuff. Then they gave away the big prizes, which included a 20" LCD flat screen TV, a DVD/VCR combo, and a digital camera.

After that we left because we were tired, full, and didn't want to play anymore cards. We were a little disappointed that we didn't come in to the money as a team. But we all had a great time, alot of laughs and a terrific day overall. It's good to golf with your friends. Thanks to Chuck "The Edge Of Darkness" Luce, my brother, for inviting me to the outing. I hope it will grow to be a tradition.

A COUPLE OF FINAL POINTS

  • The NY Mets are still in first place (Hear that Mrs. Koehler?)
  • I will soon have a Fantasy Football Directory site up and running with articles and opinions. You can see it at www.thefantasyfootballpicks.com , but it's not fully ready yet. I hope some of my friends will post their fantasy opinions on the site when I get everything ready.
  • My wife, Patty, and I went to see the Da Vinci Code last week. She had read the book and I hadn't. I knew the premise and went in with an open mind. I was glued to the edge of my seat for 2 1/2 hours. What a great murder mystery and story. Whether you buy-in to the idea or not, it's a great movie. I wouldn't watch it again, however, because once all of the shocking turns and twists are revealed, there's no surprise anymore. Kind of like watching M. Night Shamawhatever's Sixth Sense.
  • I am OFFICIALLY tired of rain. Things are saturated around here.
  • I thought Over The Hedge was cute, but not great.
  • I find a chunky Brittany Spears alot more attractive than a Paris Hilton or Nicole ("how do you like my huge head and skinny body?) Ritchie.
  • I'm rooting for the Dallas Mavericks because I'm a Dirk Nowitzki fan, although I HATE the NBA.
  • I listen to Mike and Mike in the Morning every weekday morning on ESPN radio.
  • We are in the process of planning a LARGE 20th anniversary party for our yard in August. You had better hope you're on the invite list. We are taking applications for a lottery-type approval list now.
  • Projects for this summer (if it stops raining) are painting the outside foundation of my house, painting the shed in the backyard, pressure-washing the house, and selling my 2-family house in Waterford (it's on the market now).
  • Right now I'm using charcoal to grill with instead of gas. It takes a bit longer, but to me the taste is worth it.

That's all for now folks. I really need to sit down and write more often. I'm sorry if you're a regular reader and I've been neglecting you over the last week. If there's a topic you'd like me to write about, please submit to me via email or post a comment on this site. Hey Chuck, give me something REAL to sink my writing teeth into. Anyone else?

Just don't be offended by my take on things, because you know...LEN IS RIGHT.

Thanks to all my readers.

I am Len Tollerton

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