Friends, Americans, countrymen:
It is I, your good friend in upstate NY sending along my Best Wishes for a very safe and Happy New Year.
I hope you will all exercise moderation tonight, if going out on the town. You know that law enforcement will be busy and in a rigid attitude looking for folks who want to push the limit. Be smart and be safe. It ends up costing ALOT less for a cab than it does paying a fine and increased insurance rates for a DWI (DUI).
LEN IS RIGHT will not abandon you in the New Year. That is a promise from me to you. I'm sure I'll have alot to say in 2008. We have around 375 days (give or take a day) till the ass-bag that is our President will be ushered out. Hopefully they'll just grab him by the collar and kick him to the curb. But I digress.
Congrats to the New England Patriots for finishing the Regular season undefeated. Very impressive. But, really, if they don't win the Super Bowl, the season ends up being a Colossal disappointment, doesn't it? In REALITY, I don't see anyone staying with them, so it SHOULD be a foregone conclusion. Since the Chiefs are not in the playoffs, I can say that I would like to see the Pats do it. And I have no problem with the city of Boston holding championships in the 3 major sports all at once. After the 86 year gap for the Red Sox, I think it's time those fans in the Boston area get a few years of prosperity, before the other shoe eventually drops and they're back to being also-rans.
Okay, that's it for now. Enjoy your New Year's Eve, smartly, okay?
Tkae Care.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Monday, December 31, 2007
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
MERRY CHRISTMAS MINIONS
Hello my friends:
Just a quick note to tell you Merry Christmas. I hope everyone enjoys their day with their families, friends, etc...
I will be thinking of each of you at some time today and hoping you get the most out of your quality time.
Peace and happiness to you all from us here at LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Just a quick note to tell you Merry Christmas. I hope everyone enjoys their day with their families, friends, etc...
I will be thinking of each of you at some time today and hoping you get the most out of your quality time.
Peace and happiness to you all from us here at LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Thursday, December 20, 2007
ENCOUNTERED REALISTIC IRONIES
Hey People, what's up?
Today's topic is the concept of IRONY. By definition, IRONY is the disharmony between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result.
How many of us realize that irony goes on in our lives all the time? We don't always catch it, as we are often entrenched in our routines. But sometimes realization hits. Let me give you a few examples of what I mean.
THE CRUEL IRONY OF PARENTHOOD
A personal example of irony in a cruel vein would be this: My father was a guy who was NOT into sports. He was more into the Fine Arts. Literary(read a ton), Artsy(theater, music, art), Culinary (mixed a GREAT cocktail, could cook anything), he was a guy you could hang out with and have a first-class time, because you'd be exposed to good food and drink, music, and conversation and perhaps a really good play. You weren't drinking Fleischman's liquor, it was always top-shelf.
So, what does this guy get for his ONLY child? He gets a TOTAL Jock-Rocker. Lived and Breathed all sports. Could tell you stats till the cows came home. All-Star in baseball. Found the sound of Hard Rock and Heavy Metal and thought he would never feel anything better than the sound of a Power chord struck on a Gibson Les Paul, played through a Marshall stack, on 11. It was like plugging into the wall socket and Riding the Lightning. (right now, my friend BVA is simultaneously laughing his ass off and retching up whatever flavor microwave burrito he's eating) Don't get me wrong, I can wine, dine, and Fine Art it with anyone. But you see my meaning. That would be IRONY.
Cruel Irony comes now that I have kids. My 2 boys walk around my house with Dad having Mets games on the TV, Chiefs clothing and Fantasy Football going on all fall, Metal coming from the computer speakers whlie Dad is screaming along with Bruce Dickenson of Iron Maiden, and what do I get? 2 boys who aren't really into sports or the metal, although they're both coming around to my musical tastes (screw you Brian) because of Guitar Hero and the iPod. I constantly push sports for reasons of health, fun, and teamwork or competition dynamics. I've been a coach, manager, and spectator (the toughest of the 3). They've not, to this point, embraced anything major, sports-wise. But that's them. They are parts of MORE than just ME. And as they grow and develop their own selves, I realize that maybe my influence hasn't been lost on them. That realization also qualifies, to me, as being fairly ironic. Oh, BTW, if I had access to the kind of video games they have, when I was a kid, I'd be playing them all the time, too. Oh, Irony, breathe your cruel wind over my soul.
MORE IRONY IN LEN-LAND
Now THIS irony is especially cruel to me. It's well-documented in the lives of ALOT of men that shit starts happening to your body after the age of 30 that you say, "Aww, that's not right." My personal example is about hair. Being a Metal head in the 80's meant a certain look. Some guys just grew their hair long and let it go. Some, got all permed and dressed up, like they were in the band Poison or Brittny Foxxx. Posers. Then there were the guys, like me, in the middle-kind of, where you grew your hair long, but got the perm cause your hair looked shitty straight. Anyway, you look like a rocker.
Then a few years pass and the bald-spot starts and styles in the world change. And you realize that you look ridiculous with long hair. Then you find out how easy it is to care for no hair. But you see your friends, or older people with full heads of hair and you start to become jealous. So you wish you had hair again. (side note: NEVER did I EVER consider hair-replacement at any time. You can ALWAYS tell it's fake, and the drugs are hit-and-miss at best) One day you find that your wish has been answered, but with a whole heaping dose of IRONY.
Why? Because the hair is growing on your BODY. Great for warmth in the winter. Sucks for the beach in summer. There is absolutely no reason for me to have grown the hair on my body and lost it on my head, where I want it. Does this end up being bad karma reprisal from an earlier existence? I don't know, but there's got to be someone somewhere saying,"Heh-heh. That was a good one." "What?" "Tollerton wished for hair. I grew a bear's worth for him...on his body. HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Yeah, yuk it up you ironically cruel bastard. I hope you get a nut wart. Jeez, I probably ought to stop making wishes. "Be careful what you wish for, My Dear, or you shall surely get it."
AND ONE MORE
I have a family friend who is a pretty tough guy. One night, back in the early 60's he was driving along a city street when he saw a man slapping the shit out of a woman, outside of a bar. So, not liking this, he stops and goes over to the guy and puches him out. He thinks he's done a decent thing, when the woman who was getting the crap kicked out of her attacks him and tells him to mind his own business. Stunned, he walked back to his car shaking his head, wondering, WTF!! The irony here is that you think you have a person's best interests at hand and you say something or make an action that you think is helpful, only to realize that asking first would have been a better choice. Or maybe to realize that you don't know what that person's life is, really. You can't walk in another's shoes or see through their eyes, or think what they think or feel. The knee-jerk reaction is, generally, never good. It can end up alienating others, especially those close to you. Don't make this mistake. We can't all save the world and the ironic thing is that parts of the world don't WANT to be saved. There's a message for someone there, I think. Maybe it's me.
I invite you to read a CLASSIC story of irony that goes hand-in-hand with the Holidays. The story is by Ohenry, and is entitled The Gift of the Magi. Many of you are probably very familiar with this timeless tale of love and irony. Click on the link below. Please take the time to check it out, it's only 2 pages long. www.online-literature.com/O_henry/1014/
Enjoy and thanks for stopping by LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Today's topic is the concept of IRONY. By definition, IRONY is the disharmony between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result.
How many of us realize that irony goes on in our lives all the time? We don't always catch it, as we are often entrenched in our routines. But sometimes realization hits. Let me give you a few examples of what I mean.
THE CRUEL IRONY OF PARENTHOOD
A personal example of irony in a cruel vein would be this: My father was a guy who was NOT into sports. He was more into the Fine Arts. Literary(read a ton), Artsy(theater, music, art), Culinary (mixed a GREAT cocktail, could cook anything), he was a guy you could hang out with and have a first-class time, because you'd be exposed to good food and drink, music, and conversation and perhaps a really good play. You weren't drinking Fleischman's liquor, it was always top-shelf.
So, what does this guy get for his ONLY child? He gets a TOTAL Jock-Rocker. Lived and Breathed all sports. Could tell you stats till the cows came home. All-Star in baseball. Found the sound of Hard Rock and Heavy Metal and thought he would never feel anything better than the sound of a Power chord struck on a Gibson Les Paul, played through a Marshall stack, on 11. It was like plugging into the wall socket and Riding the Lightning. (right now, my friend BVA is simultaneously laughing his ass off and retching up whatever flavor microwave burrito he's eating) Don't get me wrong, I can wine, dine, and Fine Art it with anyone. But you see my meaning. That would be IRONY.
Cruel Irony comes now that I have kids. My 2 boys walk around my house with Dad having Mets games on the TV, Chiefs clothing and Fantasy Football going on all fall, Metal coming from the computer speakers whlie Dad is screaming along with Bruce Dickenson of Iron Maiden, and what do I get? 2 boys who aren't really into sports or the metal, although they're both coming around to my musical tastes (screw you Brian) because of Guitar Hero and the iPod. I constantly push sports for reasons of health, fun, and teamwork or competition dynamics. I've been a coach, manager, and spectator (the toughest of the 3). They've not, to this point, embraced anything major, sports-wise. But that's them. They are parts of MORE than just ME. And as they grow and develop their own selves, I realize that maybe my influence hasn't been lost on them. That realization also qualifies, to me, as being fairly ironic. Oh, BTW, if I had access to the kind of video games they have, when I was a kid, I'd be playing them all the time, too. Oh, Irony, breathe your cruel wind over my soul.
MORE IRONY IN LEN-LAND
Now THIS irony is especially cruel to me. It's well-documented in the lives of ALOT of men that shit starts happening to your body after the age of 30 that you say, "Aww, that's not right." My personal example is about hair. Being a Metal head in the 80's meant a certain look. Some guys just grew their hair long and let it go. Some, got all permed and dressed up, like they were in the band Poison or Brittny Foxxx. Posers. Then there were the guys, like me, in the middle-kind of, where you grew your hair long, but got the perm cause your hair looked shitty straight. Anyway, you look like a rocker.
Then a few years pass and the bald-spot starts and styles in the world change. And you realize that you look ridiculous with long hair. Then you find out how easy it is to care for no hair. But you see your friends, or older people with full heads of hair and you start to become jealous. So you wish you had hair again. (side note: NEVER did I EVER consider hair-replacement at any time. You can ALWAYS tell it's fake, and the drugs are hit-and-miss at best) One day you find that your wish has been answered, but with a whole heaping dose of IRONY.
Why? Because the hair is growing on your BODY. Great for warmth in the winter. Sucks for the beach in summer. There is absolutely no reason for me to have grown the hair on my body and lost it on my head, where I want it. Does this end up being bad karma reprisal from an earlier existence? I don't know, but there's got to be someone somewhere saying,"Heh-heh. That was a good one." "What?" "Tollerton wished for hair. I grew a bear's worth for him...on his body. HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Yeah, yuk it up you ironically cruel bastard. I hope you get a nut wart. Jeez, I probably ought to stop making wishes. "Be careful what you wish for, My Dear, or you shall surely get it."
AND ONE MORE
I have a family friend who is a pretty tough guy. One night, back in the early 60's he was driving along a city street when he saw a man slapping the shit out of a woman, outside of a bar. So, not liking this, he stops and goes over to the guy and puches him out. He thinks he's done a decent thing, when the woman who was getting the crap kicked out of her attacks him and tells him to mind his own business. Stunned, he walked back to his car shaking his head, wondering, WTF!! The irony here is that you think you have a person's best interests at hand and you say something or make an action that you think is helpful, only to realize that asking first would have been a better choice. Or maybe to realize that you don't know what that person's life is, really. You can't walk in another's shoes or see through their eyes, or think what they think or feel. The knee-jerk reaction is, generally, never good. It can end up alienating others, especially those close to you. Don't make this mistake. We can't all save the world and the ironic thing is that parts of the world don't WANT to be saved. There's a message for someone there, I think. Maybe it's me.
I invite you to read a CLASSIC story of irony that goes hand-in-hand with the Holidays. The story is by Ohenry, and is entitled The Gift of the Magi. Many of you are probably very familiar with this timeless tale of love and irony. Click on the link below. Please take the time to check it out, it's only 2 pages long. www.online-literature.com/O_henry/1014/
Enjoy and thanks for stopping by LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Monday, December 17, 2007
THE MALAISE
Hello my friends:
Is it enough for me to say that I Hate Winter? I don't know if those 3 words acurately convey my disdain for the worst parts of this cursed season. I know, I know, just move if you don't like it. For me, in my situation, that's not possible. Every year, usually between Jan. 15 and Mar. 1st, I come down with a case of the winter blues.
THE BLUES OF WINTER
I'll try not to belabor the point. The Winter Blues is not, for me, cabin fever or post holiday stress bullshit. It's just the fact that I don't like the cold, especially the howling winds that often accompany the cold. Truth be told, I don't mind the snow that much. I actually feel pretty good after shoveling the driveway, though I think it's only cause I'm finished.
Look, I'm a tee shirt and shorts-type of guy. I figure, if you're too hot, check out some AC. In the cold, you always have to put on more clothes. "Layer yourself, man, that'll keep you warm." Yeah, and then I start taking stuff off when I get warm, and run myself through a series of electrical shocks from static as each layer comes off. If it's dark in the room, you can easily see the sparks. One of these days, my hairy ass is going up in a flashing ball of fire.
As for the Blues of Winter, I caught them Saturday night, just as the storm started, while driving to work. I'm thinking to myself, "We haven't even REACHED the first day of Winter, and I've already hit the depression. I'm in trouble.
THE SOLUTION TO THE WINTER BLUES
Is it a mantra you must chant to get yourself through it? Is there a change in diet that needs to take place? (diet...that's a funny word) Is there someone you need to talk to? NO, NO, and NO. The answer, my friends, is very easy to find. It's inside of you. It's the part of you that says, "HEY ASSHOLE!! YOU LIVE IN THE NORTHEAST. GET OVER YOURSELF. IT'S FREAKIN' WINTER. IF YOU HAD THE MONEY, YOU'D MOVE, BUT YOU DON'T. SO SUCK IT THE FREAK UP!!"
It's here, and it's not going away anytime soon. Maybe we'll get lucky and it'll have a mild back-end and I can start playing golf in March. You wouldn't believe what a pain in the ass a frozen, snow and ice-packed train is like to work on. It's cold, even when it comes into the shop. Never mind trudging across the yard in shin or knee-deep snow to get to a frozen hunk of HARD metal. "HEY, MAYBE IF YOU HAD STAYED IN SCHOOL AND LAID OFF OF THE KIND BUD, YOU MIGHT HAVE A JOB THAT ALLOWS YOU TO GET AWAY FROM THE TERM WIND-CHILL FACTOR!!!!!
Ah... but I digress. One round of shovelling snow brings you back. There's something pretty cool about being out in your driveway, when it's snowing big flakes, and there's no cars out, so it's quiet, ya know? If you stand there silent, you can hear the flakes hit the ground. Pretty neat. BTW, I'm completely sober while typing this.
Winter is here. I hope Patty keeps the heating bill up to date. I hate the cold.
From LEN IS RIGHT Headquarters,
I am,
Len Tollerton
Is it enough for me to say that I Hate Winter? I don't know if those 3 words acurately convey my disdain for the worst parts of this cursed season. I know, I know, just move if you don't like it. For me, in my situation, that's not possible. Every year, usually between Jan. 15 and Mar. 1st, I come down with a case of the winter blues.
THE BLUES OF WINTER
I'll try not to belabor the point. The Winter Blues is not, for me, cabin fever or post holiday stress bullshit. It's just the fact that I don't like the cold, especially the howling winds that often accompany the cold. Truth be told, I don't mind the snow that much. I actually feel pretty good after shoveling the driveway, though I think it's only cause I'm finished.
Look, I'm a tee shirt and shorts-type of guy. I figure, if you're too hot, check out some AC. In the cold, you always have to put on more clothes. "Layer yourself, man, that'll keep you warm." Yeah, and then I start taking stuff off when I get warm, and run myself through a series of electrical shocks from static as each layer comes off. If it's dark in the room, you can easily see the sparks. One of these days, my hairy ass is going up in a flashing ball of fire.
As for the Blues of Winter, I caught them Saturday night, just as the storm started, while driving to work. I'm thinking to myself, "We haven't even REACHED the first day of Winter, and I've already hit the depression. I'm in trouble.
THE SOLUTION TO THE WINTER BLUES
Is it a mantra you must chant to get yourself through it? Is there a change in diet that needs to take place? (diet...that's a funny word) Is there someone you need to talk to? NO, NO, and NO. The answer, my friends, is very easy to find. It's inside of you. It's the part of you that says, "HEY ASSHOLE!! YOU LIVE IN THE NORTHEAST. GET OVER YOURSELF. IT'S FREAKIN' WINTER. IF YOU HAD THE MONEY, YOU'D MOVE, BUT YOU DON'T. SO SUCK IT THE FREAK UP!!"
It's here, and it's not going away anytime soon. Maybe we'll get lucky and it'll have a mild back-end and I can start playing golf in March. You wouldn't believe what a pain in the ass a frozen, snow and ice-packed train is like to work on. It's cold, even when it comes into the shop. Never mind trudging across the yard in shin or knee-deep snow to get to a frozen hunk of HARD metal. "HEY, MAYBE IF YOU HAD STAYED IN SCHOOL AND LAID OFF OF THE KIND BUD, YOU MIGHT HAVE A JOB THAT ALLOWS YOU TO GET AWAY FROM THE TERM WIND-CHILL FACTOR!!!!!
Ah... but I digress. One round of shovelling snow brings you back. There's something pretty cool about being out in your driveway, when it's snowing big flakes, and there's no cars out, so it's quiet, ya know? If you stand there silent, you can hear the flakes hit the ground. Pretty neat. BTW, I'm completely sober while typing this.
Winter is here. I hope Patty keeps the heating bill up to date. I hate the cold.
From LEN IS RIGHT Headquarters,
I am,
Len Tollerton
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
LEN'S FAVORITES AND NON-FAVORITES
Hey Now:
This being the holiday season, I thought what would the minions like for Christmas. I know. A list of Len's personal favorites so the minions know exactly what to get the master and what to avoid. Usually it's all about you. But for today, it's gonna have to be about me. But of course, it's for the purposes of helping YOU. This mind set is what helps make ME RIGHT. So here goes:
LEN's FAVORITES:
Food Section
Teriyaki Sirloin from The Barnsider--Med. rare
Steak cooked Med. rare or rare
King Crab legs
NY City-style pizza
BBQ ribs (pork, not beef/any style)
Pan-seared salmon
Big freakin' shrimp
Sushi
Garlicky food
Peanut Butter and Strawberry Jam
Drakes Funny Bones and Ring Dings
(no surprise there, just look at me)
Blackberry or blueberry pie
Tanqueray Gin
Knob Creek Bourbon
Harpoon India Pale Ale
Iced tea (sweetened no lemon)
Music--which, by the way, I consider one of the most important things in life
Most Heavy Metal (especially the following
styles:Heavy, Power, Progressive) and Hard Rock
Favorite Bands: Rush, Black Sabbath (all singers),
Iron Maiden, Judas Priest,
AC/DC, Disturbed
Mercyful Fate, The Sword,
UFO
Hard Rock bands like: Soundgarden,
Wolfmother, Led Zep, King's X,
Foo Fighters, Black Stone Cherry
Guilty Pleasures (don't laugh):
Herb Alpert and the TJB
Rocking Kelly Clarkson songs
Jesus Christ Superstar
Sports:
NY Mets
KC Chiefs
Montreal Canadiens
The Assassins (my fantasy football team)
Playing golf/football/baseball/bowling
Poker (I know...a game not a sport)
Movies:
Jaws--my alltime #1
Star Wars (ep. 3-6)
Lord of the Rings trilogy
Indiana Jones movies
Dogma
Godfather (1 and 2, only)
Goodfellas
The Lion in Winter
Guilty Pleasures:
Love Actually-great holiday chick flick
Favorite All-Time Books
Lord of the Rings trilogy
The Hobbit
Fool on the Hill-fantastic book by Matt Ruff--tough to find
The Fionavar Tapestry--Guy Gavriel Kay
The Firm--John Grisham
Deathstalker series--Simon Green
Silence of the Lambs
Angels and Demons/DaVinci Code--Dan Brown
The Mists of Avalon--King Arthur story told from the women's point of view--very good
MISCELLANEOUS FAVORITES:
Patty, Connor and Jackson
My car--1999 Ford Crown Victoria
The Kind Bud--if you have to ask forget it
Women in heels
Dungeons and Dragons
Poker tourneys and home poker games
Smoking cigarettes--though I've recently quit
Long dinners at great restaurants
My close circle of friends--you know who you are
ABSOLUTE NON-FAVORITES
Goulash
Lima Beans
Onions (most not all styles)
Coconut--in any form whatsoever
Organ meats--except liver
White wine
Vodka
Country Western Music
Ballet
Most opera
Death and Hardcore Metal
Dylan/Seeger/Most Springsteen
Whiners and Drama queens
Any celeb with a political cause
ORGANIZED RELIGIONS--especially right-wing born-again Christians of any kind
Local Amtrak management
White trash/Black thugs-gangstas/dickhead Muslims with a cause/snobby Jews
The Unbathed-filthy people, not a band
Drunks--again people, not a band
Sleepless in Seattle/You've Got Mail
Spam--the email, not the food
Weak-minded people
The NBA--since Dr.J retired
Men who beat women
School bullies
HEROES:
ME
My wife and kids
Angus Young/Tony Iommi/Alex Lifeson/Tipton and Downing/Scott Gorham/Ian Gillan
Tom Seaver/Emmitt Smith/Julius Erving-most incredible hoop player ever/Pistol Pete Maravich/Patrick Roy-you can have Hasek, Parent, Brodeur, and Vachon, I'll take Patrick over all of them/Strawberry and Gooden--before drugs/Ken Dryden/1980 US Olympic Hockey Team/Nicklaus and Tiger/Earl Anthony--greatest, smoothest bowler of all time/Ken Griffey Jr./Jack Youngblood and Fred Dryer--1970's L.A. Rams Defensive linemen/Walt "Clyde" Frazier
Okay, thanks for indulging me for a few minutes. Stay tuned for the next episode of
LEN IS RIGHT
Until next time, Peace to my people on Earth.
I am,
Len Tollerton
This being the holiday season, I thought what would the minions like for Christmas. I know. A list of Len's personal favorites so the minions know exactly what to get the master and what to avoid. Usually it's all about you. But for today, it's gonna have to be about me. But of course, it's for the purposes of helping YOU. This mind set is what helps make ME RIGHT. So here goes:
LEN's FAVORITES:
Food Section
Teriyaki Sirloin from The Barnsider--Med. rare
Steak cooked Med. rare or rare
King Crab legs
NY City-style pizza
BBQ ribs (pork, not beef/any style)
Pan-seared salmon
Big freakin' shrimp
Sushi
Garlicky food
Peanut Butter and Strawberry Jam
Drakes Funny Bones and Ring Dings
(no surprise there, just look at me)
Blackberry or blueberry pie
Tanqueray Gin
Knob Creek Bourbon
Harpoon India Pale Ale
Iced tea (sweetened no lemon)
Music--which, by the way, I consider one of the most important things in life
Most Heavy Metal (especially the following
styles:Heavy, Power, Progressive) and Hard Rock
Favorite Bands: Rush, Black Sabbath (all singers),
Iron Maiden, Judas Priest,
AC/DC, Disturbed
Mercyful Fate, The Sword,
UFO
Hard Rock bands like: Soundgarden,
Wolfmother, Led Zep, King's X,
Foo Fighters, Black Stone Cherry
Guilty Pleasures (don't laugh):
Herb Alpert and the TJB
Rocking Kelly Clarkson songs
Jesus Christ Superstar
Sports:
NY Mets
KC Chiefs
Montreal Canadiens
The Assassins (my fantasy football team)
Playing golf/football/baseball/bowling
Poker (I know...a game not a sport)
Movies:
Jaws--my alltime #1
Star Wars (ep. 3-6)
Lord of the Rings trilogy
Indiana Jones movies
Dogma
Godfather (1 and 2, only)
Goodfellas
The Lion in Winter
Guilty Pleasures:
Love Actually-great holiday chick flick
Favorite All-Time Books
Lord of the Rings trilogy
The Hobbit
Fool on the Hill-fantastic book by Matt Ruff--tough to find
The Fionavar Tapestry--Guy Gavriel Kay
The Firm--John Grisham
Deathstalker series--Simon Green
Silence of the Lambs
Angels and Demons/DaVinci Code--Dan Brown
The Mists of Avalon--King Arthur story told from the women's point of view--very good
MISCELLANEOUS FAVORITES:
Patty, Connor and Jackson
My car--1999 Ford Crown Victoria
The Kind Bud--if you have to ask forget it
Women in heels
Dungeons and Dragons
Poker tourneys and home poker games
Smoking cigarettes--though I've recently quit
Long dinners at great restaurants
My close circle of friends--you know who you are
ABSOLUTE NON-FAVORITES
Goulash
Lima Beans
Onions (most not all styles)
Coconut--in any form whatsoever
Organ meats--except liver
White wine
Vodka
Country Western Music
Ballet
Most opera
Death and Hardcore Metal
Dylan/Seeger/Most Springsteen
Whiners and Drama queens
Any celeb with a political cause
ORGANIZED RELIGIONS--especially right-wing born-again Christians of any kind
Local Amtrak management
White trash/Black thugs-gangstas/dickhead Muslims with a cause/snobby Jews
The Unbathed-filthy people, not a band
Drunks--again people, not a band
Sleepless in Seattle/You've Got Mail
Spam--the email, not the food
Weak-minded people
The NBA--since Dr.J retired
Men who beat women
School bullies
HEROES:
ME
My wife and kids
Angus Young/Tony Iommi/Alex Lifeson/Tipton and Downing/Scott Gorham/Ian Gillan
Tom Seaver/Emmitt Smith/Julius Erving-most incredible hoop player ever/Pistol Pete Maravich/Patrick Roy-you can have Hasek, Parent, Brodeur, and Vachon, I'll take Patrick over all of them/Strawberry and Gooden--before drugs/Ken Dryden/1980 US Olympic Hockey Team/Nicklaus and Tiger/Earl Anthony--greatest, smoothest bowler of all time/Ken Griffey Jr./Jack Youngblood and Fred Dryer--1970's L.A. Rams Defensive linemen/Walt "Clyde" Frazier
Okay, thanks for indulging me for a few minutes. Stay tuned for the next episode of
LEN IS RIGHT
Until next time, Peace to my people on Earth.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Saturday, December 08, 2007
DOMINATED BY THE SHAW KID
MINIONS:
Okay, none of you ever respond to my poll questions. What kind of minions are YOU??!! You disappoint your master during the holiday season. I'm starting to get a complex. But I bet after what I'm about to tell you, I'll hear from people in freakin' Helsinki, Finland. (That's where the fans of the Assassins from Shadowland reside. The Assassins are my beloved Fantasy Football team. Our home stadium, the Pit of Despair, is in Helsinki. Makes the visiting team tired.....jet lag, ya know.)
Anyway......here we go. I bowl every 2 or 3 months. I can usually shoot anywhere from 160-230, depending on if I suck that day or not. I roll a decent ball, but have a problem with being consistent. Kind of like my golf game, though I'm better at bowling. I'm sure my father-in-law's friends in Florida will attest to that. So today I bowled in the Coach-N-Kids tournament at Sunset Lanes in Colonie. Since I don't have a sanctioned average, I had to bowl to a 200 average. I knew I wasn't likely to bowl a 600 triple, but I figured I could handle 550-580.
Our team consisted of Jackson's friend C.J. (100 avg.), Jackson (127 avg.), and Jack's team Captain, Nick Shaw (137 avg.). Okay, so I'm just bowling because they need an adult, but I'm really looking forward to it. I want to bowl really well to continue my son's hero-worship of me (tongue-in-cheek, for those who don't know me). I'm generally good at making spares. Not today, folks. No excuses, either. I just didn't have it today. Games of 155, 178 (striking out in the 10th frame), and 150 (let me just puke all over my shoes, thank-you). A 483 triple, and about 100 pins less than I had hoped for.
The Shaw kid? First, let me tell you all that his 137 average is not as accurate as you may believe. I've seen this kid throw games in the 180's, 190's and 200's. I've seen him string 5 or 6 strikes at times, then come back and throw a gutter ball. He has some talent, and I think some day he'll be on his school team, and will probably easily average in the 200's. So, this kid rolls a 133, 183, and 176, for a 492 triple. Absolutely kicks this old guy's butt, stringing strikes, making spares, just DOMINATING the master blogger. In truth, I was VERY happy for him. I really enjoy watching Jackson and Nick bowl every Saturday morning. They're both great kids with great senses of humor. They're both knuckleheads, but they're alot of fun to hang around with (when they're not being little wise-asses). I hope when they grow to be adults, that we can all hang out together playing sports, music, or just having a cocktail or two. That probably won't be until they're in their 30's, cause 20 year old guys don't usually want to hang with guys in their 50's or 60's. Luckilly, Nick's mom (the lovely Wiccan mentioned in a past post) and C.J.'s mom didn't bust my balls too bad. I was hoping to make a better showing so my teammates had a chance to grab a trophy, but not this time. Hopefully I'll be asked to participate again, cause I had alot of fun with these guys.
Since I know I have a limited audience, I will make this open wager to MY minions. I'll bowl anyone out there for the princely sum of $5/game. I'm that sure of my awesome talents. Even Chuck the E. o D. I might even be willing to go $10/game. Of course, after watching my display today, I wouldn't be surprised to see Nick's mom take me up on that wager. I think she used to bowl on the Ladies Pro Tour. I'm confident, though, cause I think I can throw her off her game by stealing her Mint Mojito gum. Ha-Hah!!! I got a plan, baby!!
You know how I know this will work? Because LEN IS RIGHT. You know it. I know it, and Jackson knows it. Stick that in your snot-locker folks.
Bring the abuse, people. I can take it. More from the home front later this week. Cheers.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Okay, none of you ever respond to my poll questions. What kind of minions are YOU??!! You disappoint your master during the holiday season. I'm starting to get a complex. But I bet after what I'm about to tell you, I'll hear from people in freakin' Helsinki, Finland. (That's where the fans of the Assassins from Shadowland reside. The Assassins are my beloved Fantasy Football team. Our home stadium, the Pit of Despair, is in Helsinki. Makes the visiting team tired.....jet lag, ya know.)
Anyway......here we go. I bowl every 2 or 3 months. I can usually shoot anywhere from 160-230, depending on if I suck that day or not. I roll a decent ball, but have a problem with being consistent. Kind of like my golf game, though I'm better at bowling. I'm sure my father-in-law's friends in Florida will attest to that. So today I bowled in the Coach-N-Kids tournament at Sunset Lanes in Colonie. Since I don't have a sanctioned average, I had to bowl to a 200 average. I knew I wasn't likely to bowl a 600 triple, but I figured I could handle 550-580.
Our team consisted of Jackson's friend C.J. (100 avg.), Jackson (127 avg.), and Jack's team Captain, Nick Shaw (137 avg.). Okay, so I'm just bowling because they need an adult, but I'm really looking forward to it. I want to bowl really well to continue my son's hero-worship of me (tongue-in-cheek, for those who don't know me). I'm generally good at making spares. Not today, folks. No excuses, either. I just didn't have it today. Games of 155, 178 (striking out in the 10th frame), and 150 (let me just puke all over my shoes, thank-you). A 483 triple, and about 100 pins less than I had hoped for.
The Shaw kid? First, let me tell you all that his 137 average is not as accurate as you may believe. I've seen this kid throw games in the 180's, 190's and 200's. I've seen him string 5 or 6 strikes at times, then come back and throw a gutter ball. He has some talent, and I think some day he'll be on his school team, and will probably easily average in the 200's. So, this kid rolls a 133, 183, and 176, for a 492 triple. Absolutely kicks this old guy's butt, stringing strikes, making spares, just DOMINATING the master blogger. In truth, I was VERY happy for him. I really enjoy watching Jackson and Nick bowl every Saturday morning. They're both great kids with great senses of humor. They're both knuckleheads, but they're alot of fun to hang around with (when they're not being little wise-asses). I hope when they grow to be adults, that we can all hang out together playing sports, music, or just having a cocktail or two. That probably won't be until they're in their 30's, cause 20 year old guys don't usually want to hang with guys in their 50's or 60's. Luckilly, Nick's mom (the lovely Wiccan mentioned in a past post) and C.J.'s mom didn't bust my balls too bad. I was hoping to make a better showing so my teammates had a chance to grab a trophy, but not this time. Hopefully I'll be asked to participate again, cause I had alot of fun with these guys.
Since I know I have a limited audience, I will make this open wager to MY minions. I'll bowl anyone out there for the princely sum of $5/game. I'm that sure of my awesome talents. Even Chuck the E. o D. I might even be willing to go $10/game. Of course, after watching my display today, I wouldn't be surprised to see Nick's mom take me up on that wager. I think she used to bowl on the Ladies Pro Tour. I'm confident, though, cause I think I can throw her off her game by stealing her Mint Mojito gum. Ha-Hah!!! I got a plan, baby!!
You know how I know this will work? Because LEN IS RIGHT. You know it. I know it, and Jackson knows it. Stick that in your snot-locker folks.
Bring the abuse, people. I can take it. More from the home front later this week. Cheers.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Monday, December 03, 2007
THE GLAZE
Good morning Minions:
Well, it's finally here, folks. Winter has officially settled in here in the Great Northeast. And what, you ask, is The Glaze?
In our house, we call it Magic Shell. It is that nice layer of thin, rippled ice that covers everything in sight, takes forever to defrost, and doesn't scrape off easily. Although I will say we were somewhat lucky, as the temperature rose into the 30's around 4:00 a.m. and the freezing rain turned to plain rain, and just made everything wet. At least that's how it was in Albany. Outlying areas, I don't know.
THE MIDNIGHT COMMUTE
I was fortunate to have to drive to work as the storm got going in earnest, last night around 11:30. From 11:00-12:00 the weather went from snow, to light rain, to freezing rain, to sleet. The beginning of the commute wasn't bad, but as I progressed, the roads got worse, culminating with the Amtrak parking lot, which hadn't been salted by the Building and Bridge Dept, and was thus a single sheet of ice.
One guy got taken out in an ambulance after falling in the railyard. He was a Coach Cleaner who was crossing the tracks to get to his train. Unfortunately for him, he decided against wearing his hard hat and is now not likely to have any recompense for his injury because he wasn't wearing the required Personal Protective Equipment. That's the way things work with injuries at Amtrak.
Anyway...I was able to get enough fishtailing practice with my car, that now I am all set for the winter. I feel I can now safely navigate any of winter's driving pitfalls, for the season. Of course my car is rear-wheel drive, so my car CAN fishtail. Most of you folks never experience this with front-wheel drive. But I like to live on the edge. I'm radical, baby.
It's always interesting watching the people who forgot how to drive in winter weather conditions every year. It's like it's their first winter ever. People, adjust for the conditions, huh? Be safe and don't assume everyone drives as well as you do. Have some escape room, slow down a little and stay off of your freakin' cellphone. We know you're gonna be late, honey, just get there safe. Stop talking on the phone telling the office the obvious.
I think you know that, LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Well, it's finally here, folks. Winter has officially settled in here in the Great Northeast. And what, you ask, is The Glaze?
In our house, we call it Magic Shell. It is that nice layer of thin, rippled ice that covers everything in sight, takes forever to defrost, and doesn't scrape off easily. Although I will say we were somewhat lucky, as the temperature rose into the 30's around 4:00 a.m. and the freezing rain turned to plain rain, and just made everything wet. At least that's how it was in Albany. Outlying areas, I don't know.
THE MIDNIGHT COMMUTE
I was fortunate to have to drive to work as the storm got going in earnest, last night around 11:30. From 11:00-12:00 the weather went from snow, to light rain, to freezing rain, to sleet. The beginning of the commute wasn't bad, but as I progressed, the roads got worse, culminating with the Amtrak parking lot, which hadn't been salted by the Building and Bridge Dept, and was thus a single sheet of ice.
One guy got taken out in an ambulance after falling in the railyard. He was a Coach Cleaner who was crossing the tracks to get to his train. Unfortunately for him, he decided against wearing his hard hat and is now not likely to have any recompense for his injury because he wasn't wearing the required Personal Protective Equipment. That's the way things work with injuries at Amtrak.
Anyway...I was able to get enough fishtailing practice with my car, that now I am all set for the winter. I feel I can now safely navigate any of winter's driving pitfalls, for the season. Of course my car is rear-wheel drive, so my car CAN fishtail. Most of you folks never experience this with front-wheel drive. But I like to live on the edge. I'm radical, baby.
It's always interesting watching the people who forgot how to drive in winter weather conditions every year. It's like it's their first winter ever. People, adjust for the conditions, huh? Be safe and don't assume everyone drives as well as you do. Have some escape room, slow down a little and stay off of your freakin' cellphone. We know you're gonna be late, honey, just get there safe. Stop talking on the phone telling the office the obvious.
I think you know that, LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Thursday, November 29, 2007
MY HUMOR THANKS TO THE SUMMERS FAMILY
Greetings min-yo-nays:
It is I, your good friend Len, back with another Len Is Right post. Today, I'm going to give some props to some friends who had an influence on me as a kid.
HERE'S TO THE SUMMERS FAMILY
Hey, a couple of weeks ago, I was visiting my closest friend from high school, who was here visiting family. This guy's name is Tom Summers. He was also the Best Man at my wedding. We graduated Christian Bros. Academy (a local military high school run by the Christian Brothers) in 1981, and for the last 3 years of school, I used to hang at Tom's house after school, pretty much all the time.
This post is kind of a Thank You to the Summers family for helping me develop my sense of humor and to not take things too seriously in life. Tom, along with his brothers John, Dan, George, and Charlie always welcomed me into the fold and we always had a great time hanging out, shooting air-pistols, partying (WOW...guess what I did in HIGH school), and just doing alot of laughing.
I guess you could call our sense of humor "all-encompassing." It was made up from classic comedy movies, TV, and stand-up comedians of the day, with a heavy dose of Monty Python and the Firesign Theater thrown in. If you have found anything I write, or anything I say funny, you can kind-of thank the Summers brothers (and definitely NOT the
Christian Brothers, unless it was for mocking humor).
To this day, my family and I still sit around at the dinner table making stupid quotes from movies to make each other laugh. Impressions also play a part in my sense of humor. I have learned to do the voices and sounds of alot of movies and cartoons over the years, and the reason for this is because I had to do something to keep up with these guys. Believe me, with 5 of them, it was tough to find a spot to get in a word, but I managed.
These guys got their humor, I think, from their Dad, John Sr. I remember one of the first times I experienced humor from Mr. Summers. Everytime I had previously met the guy, he seemed very gruff and strict. He came home from work one autumn day while we were all laying about after a bit of a smoke (nudge-nudge). There was a bushel of apples in a basket on the floor, which no one seemed to be eating. Mr. Summers says to us, gruffly: "Hey!! You guys better start eating these damn apples.....what do you think, they grow on trees?" Now I'm sure that doesn't seem that funny reading it, but we all, at the time, thought it was hilarious. That was my first experience with John Summers humor. After that day, he always seemed alot nicer than I originally thought.
These days, with the Summers family scattered all over the Capital District, and my friend Tom living up in Maine, we don't see each other that much. When I do see them, it's always like going home, because we still laugh at the same shit, even quoting the same lines we used to. It just seems any conversation we have leads to the classic humor. So, here, publicly, I'd like to send my heartfelt thanks to Tom, John, Dan, George, Chuck, and Mr.& Mrs. Summers for being a positive influence on who I am today, as a person. Thanks guys. It's always meant alot to me and I've never said anything to you.
AND YOU, MY MINIONS?
Well, jeez, I only got one answer from you on my Thanksgiving poll. I know you guys are reading. How about a little participation, huh? Why so quiet out there? You afraid to bare your souls to the world at a website viewed by tens? Don't be weak. Stand up! Voice an opinion.
How about this? Send me, or post a response here telling us how someone (family, friend, whatever) influenced you to be who you are. Where does your sense of humor come from? Who did you get your drive from? Who taught you how to play cards, or golf, or an instrument? Anything. You're all starving me out there. Except for Uncle Bob, the Mixologist, I haven't heard from you people in a long time. Someone save my life tonight, sugar bear. Let me hear you.
Show me that LEN IS RIGHT!!
I am,
Len Tollerton
It is I, your good friend Len, back with another Len Is Right post. Today, I'm going to give some props to some friends who had an influence on me as a kid.
HERE'S TO THE SUMMERS FAMILY
Hey, a couple of weeks ago, I was visiting my closest friend from high school, who was here visiting family. This guy's name is Tom Summers. He was also the Best Man at my wedding. We graduated Christian Bros. Academy (a local military high school run by the Christian Brothers) in 1981, and for the last 3 years of school, I used to hang at Tom's house after school, pretty much all the time.
This post is kind of a Thank You to the Summers family for helping me develop my sense of humor and to not take things too seriously in life. Tom, along with his brothers John, Dan, George, and Charlie always welcomed me into the fold and we always had a great time hanging out, shooting air-pistols, partying (WOW...guess what I did in HIGH school), and just doing alot of laughing.
I guess you could call our sense of humor "all-encompassing." It was made up from classic comedy movies, TV, and stand-up comedians of the day, with a heavy dose of Monty Python and the Firesign Theater thrown in. If you have found anything I write, or anything I say funny, you can kind-of thank the Summers brothers (and definitely NOT the
Christian Brothers, unless it was for mocking humor).
To this day, my family and I still sit around at the dinner table making stupid quotes from movies to make each other laugh. Impressions also play a part in my sense of humor. I have learned to do the voices and sounds of alot of movies and cartoons over the years, and the reason for this is because I had to do something to keep up with these guys. Believe me, with 5 of them, it was tough to find a spot to get in a word, but I managed.
These guys got their humor, I think, from their Dad, John Sr. I remember one of the first times I experienced humor from Mr. Summers. Everytime I had previously met the guy, he seemed very gruff and strict. He came home from work one autumn day while we were all laying about after a bit of a smoke (nudge-nudge). There was a bushel of apples in a basket on the floor, which no one seemed to be eating. Mr. Summers says to us, gruffly: "Hey!! You guys better start eating these damn apples.....what do you think, they grow on trees?" Now I'm sure that doesn't seem that funny reading it, but we all, at the time, thought it was hilarious. That was my first experience with John Summers humor. After that day, he always seemed alot nicer than I originally thought.
These days, with the Summers family scattered all over the Capital District, and my friend Tom living up in Maine, we don't see each other that much. When I do see them, it's always like going home, because we still laugh at the same shit, even quoting the same lines we used to. It just seems any conversation we have leads to the classic humor. So, here, publicly, I'd like to send my heartfelt thanks to Tom, John, Dan, George, Chuck, and Mr.& Mrs. Summers for being a positive influence on who I am today, as a person. Thanks guys. It's always meant alot to me and I've never said anything to you.
AND YOU, MY MINIONS?
Well, jeez, I only got one answer from you on my Thanksgiving poll. I know you guys are reading. How about a little participation, huh? Why so quiet out there? You afraid to bare your souls to the world at a website viewed by tens? Don't be weak. Stand up! Voice an opinion.
How about this? Send me, or post a response here telling us how someone (family, friend, whatever) influenced you to be who you are. Where does your sense of humor come from? Who did you get your drive from? Who taught you how to play cards, or golf, or an instrument? Anything. You're all starving me out there. Except for Uncle Bob, the Mixologist, I haven't heard from you people in a long time. Someone save my life tonight, sugar bear. Let me hear you.
Show me that LEN IS RIGHT!!
I am,
Len Tollerton
Friday, November 23, 2007
FIRST ANSWER TO POLL QUESTION
Hey:
I have my first and only answer, so far, to my Thanksgivng poll question.
Uncle Bob the Mixologist suggests this Thanksgiving cocktail:
Wild Turkey and Cranberry juice. Salud!!
BOB IS RIGHT!!!!!
I have my first and only answer, so far, to my Thanksgivng poll question.
Uncle Bob the Mixologist suggests this Thanksgiving cocktail:
Wild Turkey and Cranberry juice. Salud!!
BOB IS RIGHT!!!!!
Thursday, November 22, 2007
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL
Hello my friends and relatives:
May you and your families enjoy your time with each other on Turkey Day. Please try to be as safe as possible, and remember that getting there is more important than getting there quickly.
Hey, I'm hoping to insert a daily poll question onto this site, if I can get the info from Blogger. That will at least give you all a reason to show up here.
TODAY'S MAKESHIFT THANKSGIVING POLL QUESTION
Of course, we all generally have turkey, mashed taters, squash, stuffing (dressing), rolls, cranberry sauce of some kind, and pumpkin, apple, mincemeat, or sweet potato pies. What LEN IS RIGHT would like to know is: What are some of the foods that your family makes, or likes, or were served at the place you were eating, that were out of the "ordinary?" I mean, do you or someone in your family make something that doesn't generally translate to traditional Thanksgiving? A little seafood on the half-shell? Turkey liver pate' from a freshly-killed turkey? A different kind of vegetable casserole? Some kind of wild dessert? I know our friend, Tom "the serious game hunter" from Florida eats, pretty much, only meat he has hunted. Fortunately for me, we got to pass on the green bean casserole with the fried onions on top. How about a special holiday cocktail? TELL ME WHAT YOU MAKE OR LIKE, AMERICA!!
Just log in and become a member, like the Edge of Darkness or She Who Is In Hell, or Shadow. It's not hard to do and I'd like to get your opinions.
ONCE AGAIN WITH OLD WOOD
Once again for those who missed it, please join me, Patty , and Roy tomorrow (Friday) night at Cheers' Roadhouse on Fuller Rd. for Jeff the Palooka's band, Old Wood. Starts around 9:30. Hope to see you there.
HOW 'BOUT THEM GAS PRICES?
I'll say it again. Record profits reported by the oil companies (Exxon/Mobil, etc...), new highs for a barrel of oil, and right now, today $3.28 for regular gas at a local Exxon (generally higher than most). That's lucky for the kids of the corporate execs. They'll all be getting Wii's and ipods, and Playstation 3's ($600), and new cars for Christmas. This is all done on the backs of YOU, the American consumer. Have a nice day. Oh BTW, the guy behind the counter at the gas station does not make the prices, he just collects the money. Don't yell at him, it's not his fault. He's paying the same as you.
MESSAGE FOR THE WICCAN'S DAUGHTER
Hey Rebecca! I heard you recently quit cooking because you didn't get along with, or had a falling out with a teacher. I was really disappointed by that. From what I know of you, you've got a fierce determination inside of you. I've heard you really like cooking. Maybe it's a passion. Hey, let me tell you something. And you better listen, ya knucklehead. If you're going to let certain people dissuade you from your dreams, if you're going to let one snag in the road, one contrary person get in the way of going for your dreams, if you're going to let adversity dictate your life, rather than YOU DICTATE to adversity, you're going to get nowhere in life. You'll end up being some lowly railroad worker wondering, someday, what happened to your life. Not Kidding. I don't know you that well, but I know this: You're young, ambitious, and maybe you have a passion. Ride that Passion, kid. Don't be a "woulda-coulda-shoulda." Be a "I want it, I'm going to Get it"-type person. Find a new teacher. Seek out new techniques to learn. Go talk to Carmine Sprio, who owns Carmines and ask him for some advice. Maybe he'll let you be on his TV show, which is taped in his restaurant on Central Ave. Don't throw it away, girl. You WILL regret it later. GET TO WORK!!
BLACK FRIDAY
My friend, Chuck, the E.O.D, will have his family in the mall at 6:00 a.m. tomorrow to take advantage of all the big early-bird specials at the stores. It's become a yearly family tradition at the Younger Luce household. I'd like to wish Chuck, Trish and the girls best of luck tomorrow, ya freaks.
For the rest of you, do yourself and ME a big favor. STAY AT HOME. I need to run some errands...NOT XMAS SHOP, tomorrow. I don't need you screwball pseudo-bargain-hunting wack-a-moles out on my town's streets delaying me from getting out of my street or finding a gosh darn parking space. And believe me, I have no problem parking in the outer reaches and making a 5-minute walk to the building. It would just be nice to find a parking space at all.
So, if you are a fan of LEN IS RIGHT, or you're hoping to become RIGHT, yourself, or you'd just like to be recognized as a fairly smart and reasonable individual, you will take my advice and STAY HOME tomorrow. Don't go shopping, don't go browsing, don't go out to eat. You have enough food in the house already. There will be plenty to watch on TV, there will be people to chat with online. In short I'm sure you can find something to do at home, tomorrow, instead of delaying me from my errands by being out on these Albany (Colonie) streets. Give Len a break.
We have now reached the Holiday Season. As you can tell, Len may have turned into a curmudgeon. You know, there is a fine line between being cynical and being a curmudgeon. I hope to always lean to the left side of that, but as I get older I wonder if I'm just a curmudgeonly complainer.
Naaaahhhh.....can't be that. I'm vibrant, baby! My shit is fresh!! I've got MAD stuff to say. I was, am and will ALWAYS be THE Man. You know it. I know it. And we wouldn't have it any other way, would we? AND WHY???? SAY IT!! SAY IT!! SCREAM FOR ME, HELSINKI!!!
LEN IS RIGHT!! LEN IS RIGHT!! LEN IS RIGHT!!! Give yourselves a hand for being RIGHT. You deserve it.
I Love You, my Minions.
I am,
Len Tollerton
May you and your families enjoy your time with each other on Turkey Day. Please try to be as safe as possible, and remember that getting there is more important than getting there quickly.
Hey, I'm hoping to insert a daily poll question onto this site, if I can get the info from Blogger. That will at least give you all a reason to show up here.
TODAY'S MAKESHIFT THANKSGIVING POLL QUESTION
Of course, we all generally have turkey, mashed taters, squash, stuffing (dressing), rolls, cranberry sauce of some kind, and pumpkin, apple, mincemeat, or sweet potato pies. What LEN IS RIGHT would like to know is: What are some of the foods that your family makes, or likes, or were served at the place you were eating, that were out of the "ordinary?" I mean, do you or someone in your family make something that doesn't generally translate to traditional Thanksgiving? A little seafood on the half-shell? Turkey liver pate' from a freshly-killed turkey? A different kind of vegetable casserole? Some kind of wild dessert? I know our friend, Tom "the serious game hunter" from Florida eats, pretty much, only meat he has hunted. Fortunately for me, we got to pass on the green bean casserole with the fried onions on top. How about a special holiday cocktail? TELL ME WHAT YOU MAKE OR LIKE, AMERICA!!
Just log in and become a member, like the Edge of Darkness or She Who Is In Hell, or Shadow. It's not hard to do and I'd like to get your opinions.
ONCE AGAIN WITH OLD WOOD
Once again for those who missed it, please join me, Patty , and Roy tomorrow (Friday) night at Cheers' Roadhouse on Fuller Rd. for Jeff the Palooka's band, Old Wood. Starts around 9:30. Hope to see you there.
HOW 'BOUT THEM GAS PRICES?
I'll say it again. Record profits reported by the oil companies (Exxon/Mobil, etc...), new highs for a barrel of oil, and right now, today $3.28 for regular gas at a local Exxon (generally higher than most). That's lucky for the kids of the corporate execs. They'll all be getting Wii's and ipods, and Playstation 3's ($600), and new cars for Christmas. This is all done on the backs of YOU, the American consumer. Have a nice day. Oh BTW, the guy behind the counter at the gas station does not make the prices, he just collects the money. Don't yell at him, it's not his fault. He's paying the same as you.
MESSAGE FOR THE WICCAN'S DAUGHTER
Hey Rebecca! I heard you recently quit cooking because you didn't get along with, or had a falling out with a teacher. I was really disappointed by that. From what I know of you, you've got a fierce determination inside of you. I've heard you really like cooking. Maybe it's a passion. Hey, let me tell you something. And you better listen, ya knucklehead. If you're going to let certain people dissuade you from your dreams, if you're going to let one snag in the road, one contrary person get in the way of going for your dreams, if you're going to let adversity dictate your life, rather than YOU DICTATE to adversity, you're going to get nowhere in life. You'll end up being some lowly railroad worker wondering, someday, what happened to your life. Not Kidding. I don't know you that well, but I know this: You're young, ambitious, and maybe you have a passion. Ride that Passion, kid. Don't be a "woulda-coulda-shoulda." Be a "I want it, I'm going to Get it"-type person. Find a new teacher. Seek out new techniques to learn. Go talk to Carmine Sprio, who owns Carmines and ask him for some advice. Maybe he'll let you be on his TV show, which is taped in his restaurant on Central Ave. Don't throw it away, girl. You WILL regret it later. GET TO WORK!!
BLACK FRIDAY
My friend, Chuck, the E.O.D, will have his family in the mall at 6:00 a.m. tomorrow to take advantage of all the big early-bird specials at the stores. It's become a yearly family tradition at the Younger Luce household. I'd like to wish Chuck, Trish and the girls best of luck tomorrow, ya freaks.
For the rest of you, do yourself and ME a big favor. STAY AT HOME. I need to run some errands...NOT XMAS SHOP, tomorrow. I don't need you screwball pseudo-bargain-hunting wack-a-moles out on my town's streets delaying me from getting out of my street or finding a gosh darn parking space. And believe me, I have no problem parking in the outer reaches and making a 5-minute walk to the building. It would just be nice to find a parking space at all.
So, if you are a fan of LEN IS RIGHT, or you're hoping to become RIGHT, yourself, or you'd just like to be recognized as a fairly smart and reasonable individual, you will take my advice and STAY HOME tomorrow. Don't go shopping, don't go browsing, don't go out to eat. You have enough food in the house already. There will be plenty to watch on TV, there will be people to chat with online. In short I'm sure you can find something to do at home, tomorrow, instead of delaying me from my errands by being out on these Albany (Colonie) streets. Give Len a break.
We have now reached the Holiday Season. As you can tell, Len may have turned into a curmudgeon. You know, there is a fine line between being cynical and being a curmudgeon. I hope to always lean to the left side of that, but as I get older I wonder if I'm just a curmudgeonly complainer.
Naaaahhhh.....can't be that. I'm vibrant, baby! My shit is fresh!! I've got MAD stuff to say. I was, am and will ALWAYS be THE Man. You know it. I know it. And we wouldn't have it any other way, would we? AND WHY???? SAY IT!! SAY IT!! SCREAM FOR ME, HELSINKI!!!
LEN IS RIGHT!! LEN IS RIGHT!! LEN IS RIGHT!!! Give yourselves a hand for being RIGHT. You deserve it.
I Love You, my Minions.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Monday, November 19, 2007
ALEXANDER MUNDY AND OTHER POINTS
Greetings to the Minions:
Hey y'all, how was the weekend? Hey, LEN IS RIGHT is back again to discuss a couple of things...a few points of contention. Also, I'd like to see if some of you out there remember what I thought was the coolest show on TV when I was a kid.
IT TAKES A THIEF
Recently I've asked some people I know if they remember a TV show from the 60's called It Takes a Thief. It starred Robert Wagner as master-thief Alexander Mundy, who steals FOR the government in order to avoid going to prison. His boss, played by Malachi Throne, sends him all over the world on capers during the 60's Cold War-era. Al Mundy was a cross between a master-thief and a James Bond-like spy, wearing the best clothes, using the newest gadgets, and getting intimate with whatever European hottie was in the episode. In short, he was just about the coolest dude on the planet and in my opinion, the coolest guy on TV. In short, men wanted to BE him, and women just WANTED him. The show only ran for 2 or 3 seasons before it got ridiculous and was cancelled. If you've never seen the show, you'll have a really tough time finding it, as it is never played on TV Land and there is no DVD set of the series, yet.
As I look back, It Takes A Thief was one of a bunch of really cool shows to come out of that time. Some of the other ones that were favorites in my house were I Spy with Bill Cosby and Robert Culp, The Man from U.N.C.L.E. with David McCallum and Robert Vaughn, Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea with Richard Basehart and David Hedison, and the Western series The Wild, Wild West with Robert Conrad and Ross Martin.
If you're under 40, you probably don't remember any of these shows, unless you caught them in syndicated reruns in later years. These days, spy/thief/intrigue-style shows often go for gritty reality with special effects. Back then, those shows, while having high-tech gadgetry also seemed to have a class and style that many shows now lack or try to hard to attain. Don't get me wrong, shows like 24, the Unit, Journeyman, and the CSI's are all really great. But I'd like to call your attention to some really great, really cool shows from past years.
A-ROD and THE YANKEES
This week we get to be treated with watching the Yanks try to re-sign the newly-named 2007 AL MVP. For fans all over the country I've got to say I hope they sign him soon. Why? Well, it's not because I'm a Yankee fan. It's because I'd like to NOT have to hear about it anymore. After A-Rod's scumbag agent, Scott Boras made his classless statement at the end of the World Series that A-Rod was done with the Yanks, there has been alot of speculation over where he'd go. As a Met fan, I really couldn't care less, as long as it's not to Atlanta. HATE THE BRAVES!!!
It IS funny, however, that A-Rod won the AL MVP as a member of the Yanks in 2005. Their fair-weather, and short-memoried fans wanted him gone in 2006, because he was having an off-year. I mean, if you're from NY State, the summer of 2006 was a 7-month long whine-fest by Yankee fans who hated A-Rod. Then...then he begins 2007 on fire and doesn't really let up (until the playoffs), and all of a sudden the fans think this guy has a seat next to God and Babe Ruth. Face it Yankee fans, he's the best all-around player in the game. You can't get anyone better and your team is lucky enough to be able to afford him. How'bout just shutting the freak up, good or bad. Without him, you're all toast.
Good thing you guys re-signed Jorge Posada. You'll need him and he's still viable for a couple more years. I happen to know a lovely Wiccan fan of Jorge who is very happy he is staying in New York.
PATRIOT CRUSH
The New England Patriots may go undefeated for the regular season, but one thing is for sure. They will be your NFL Champion come February my friends. That is, assuming Tom Brady doesn't get hurt. 5 more TD passes yesterday, with 4 going to Randy Moss. How many people thought Moss was washed up? Alot. I thought he was the perfect fit for the Pats because I knew Belicheck wouldn't put up with his ego shit. Of course, there's been no adversity this year, so stay tuned next year. Oh sure, they could let down and take a loss this season. But rest-assured, come February, they will be your champion of the NFL. Call me on this if I turn out wrong. Wait. Never mind. LEN IS RIGHT so I won't turn out wrong.
MATT CARROLL OF THE NBA'S CHARLOTTE BOBCATS
Hey, if you don't know it already, I have a cousin that plays in the NBA. His name is Matt Carroll and he plays for the Charlotte Bobcats. He starred at Notre Dame and started his career with the Portland Trail Blazers. He then moved to the San Antonio Spurs and now is the 6th man for the Bobcats. He's a very good all-around player who occasionally leads the team in scoring. He scored 16 the other night. Please check him out in the NBA boxscores. Oh, BTW, I've never met him. I was at his parents wedding when I was a freshman in high school, but haven't really seen his family since. From all accounts this is one of the good guys in sports. He signs autographs, cares about the fans, etc... His whole family was big into sports. His dad was Penn State's backup QB in the 70's and his uncle pitched in the Big Leagues for the Cincinnatti Reds. Matt's brother, Pat, starred at St. Joseph's a couple of years ago and was ranked #3 in 3-point shooting in the country. Pretty good family legacy.
LET'S NOT FORGET BOWLING
Looking for something fun to do in your off time? When's the last time you went bowling? I know it's not the glamour sport everyone thinks about. And in truth, I hadn't really thought about it for years until my kids started bowling 3 years ago. Now, I bowled from the age of 7 till Senior year of high school. I lost touch with it for years. In truth, there's little chance of me joining a league now, as an adult, because the season is so damn long (usually 30-33 weeks). If I could get into a 15-20-week league, I'd think about it.
However, if you're looking for something fun to do with friends, that's not too expensive, and ends up being alot of fun, checking out your local bowling establishment could be the way to go. I swear you'll probably be taken back to your youth and really enjoy yourself. And unlike golf, which can drive a person to madness and anger after just a few holes, bowling gives everyone a chance to do well. You might not roll 200's regularly, but everyone can string 3-6 strikes, or pick up a nice split, occasionally. Plus, it's something that's great for a first date, or a family night out, or some friendly sporting competition between you and your buds. Give bowling a try again. You'll thank me later.
Why? You KNOW why!! Because LEN IS RIGHT!!
See you soon.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Hey y'all, how was the weekend? Hey, LEN IS RIGHT is back again to discuss a couple of things...a few points of contention. Also, I'd like to see if some of you out there remember what I thought was the coolest show on TV when I was a kid.
IT TAKES A THIEF
Recently I've asked some people I know if they remember a TV show from the 60's called It Takes a Thief. It starred Robert Wagner as master-thief Alexander Mundy, who steals FOR the government in order to avoid going to prison. His boss, played by Malachi Throne, sends him all over the world on capers during the 60's Cold War-era. Al Mundy was a cross between a master-thief and a James Bond-like spy, wearing the best clothes, using the newest gadgets, and getting intimate with whatever European hottie was in the episode. In short, he was just about the coolest dude on the planet and in my opinion, the coolest guy on TV. In short, men wanted to BE him, and women just WANTED him. The show only ran for 2 or 3 seasons before it got ridiculous and was cancelled. If you've never seen the show, you'll have a really tough time finding it, as it is never played on TV Land and there is no DVD set of the series, yet.
As I look back, It Takes A Thief was one of a bunch of really cool shows to come out of that time. Some of the other ones that were favorites in my house were I Spy with Bill Cosby and Robert Culp, The Man from U.N.C.L.E. with David McCallum and Robert Vaughn, Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea with Richard Basehart and David Hedison, and the Western series The Wild, Wild West with Robert Conrad and Ross Martin.
If you're under 40, you probably don't remember any of these shows, unless you caught them in syndicated reruns in later years. These days, spy/thief/intrigue-style shows often go for gritty reality with special effects. Back then, those shows, while having high-tech gadgetry also seemed to have a class and style that many shows now lack or try to hard to attain. Don't get me wrong, shows like 24, the Unit, Journeyman, and the CSI's are all really great. But I'd like to call your attention to some really great, really cool shows from past years.
A-ROD and THE YANKEES
This week we get to be treated with watching the Yanks try to re-sign the newly-named 2007 AL MVP. For fans all over the country I've got to say I hope they sign him soon. Why? Well, it's not because I'm a Yankee fan. It's because I'd like to NOT have to hear about it anymore. After A-Rod's scumbag agent, Scott Boras made his classless statement at the end of the World Series that A-Rod was done with the Yanks, there has been alot of speculation over where he'd go. As a Met fan, I really couldn't care less, as long as it's not to Atlanta. HATE THE BRAVES!!!
It IS funny, however, that A-Rod won the AL MVP as a member of the Yanks in 2005. Their fair-weather, and short-memoried fans wanted him gone in 2006, because he was having an off-year. I mean, if you're from NY State, the summer of 2006 was a 7-month long whine-fest by Yankee fans who hated A-Rod. Then...then he begins 2007 on fire and doesn't really let up (until the playoffs), and all of a sudden the fans think this guy has a seat next to God and Babe Ruth. Face it Yankee fans, he's the best all-around player in the game. You can't get anyone better and your team is lucky enough to be able to afford him. How'bout just shutting the freak up, good or bad. Without him, you're all toast.
Good thing you guys re-signed Jorge Posada. You'll need him and he's still viable for a couple more years. I happen to know a lovely Wiccan fan of Jorge who is very happy he is staying in New York.
PATRIOT CRUSH
The New England Patriots may go undefeated for the regular season, but one thing is for sure. They will be your NFL Champion come February my friends. That is, assuming Tom Brady doesn't get hurt. 5 more TD passes yesterday, with 4 going to Randy Moss. How many people thought Moss was washed up? Alot. I thought he was the perfect fit for the Pats because I knew Belicheck wouldn't put up with his ego shit. Of course, there's been no adversity this year, so stay tuned next year. Oh sure, they could let down and take a loss this season. But rest-assured, come February, they will be your champion of the NFL. Call me on this if I turn out wrong. Wait. Never mind. LEN IS RIGHT so I won't turn out wrong.
MATT CARROLL OF THE NBA'S CHARLOTTE BOBCATS
Hey, if you don't know it already, I have a cousin that plays in the NBA. His name is Matt Carroll and he plays for the Charlotte Bobcats. He starred at Notre Dame and started his career with the Portland Trail Blazers. He then moved to the San Antonio Spurs and now is the 6th man for the Bobcats. He's a very good all-around player who occasionally leads the team in scoring. He scored 16 the other night. Please check him out in the NBA boxscores. Oh, BTW, I've never met him. I was at his parents wedding when I was a freshman in high school, but haven't really seen his family since. From all accounts this is one of the good guys in sports. He signs autographs, cares about the fans, etc... His whole family was big into sports. His dad was Penn State's backup QB in the 70's and his uncle pitched in the Big Leagues for the Cincinnatti Reds. Matt's brother, Pat, starred at St. Joseph's a couple of years ago and was ranked #3 in 3-point shooting in the country. Pretty good family legacy.
LET'S NOT FORGET BOWLING
Looking for something fun to do in your off time? When's the last time you went bowling? I know it's not the glamour sport everyone thinks about. And in truth, I hadn't really thought about it for years until my kids started bowling 3 years ago. Now, I bowled from the age of 7 till Senior year of high school. I lost touch with it for years. In truth, there's little chance of me joining a league now, as an adult, because the season is so damn long (usually 30-33 weeks). If I could get into a 15-20-week league, I'd think about it.
However, if you're looking for something fun to do with friends, that's not too expensive, and ends up being alot of fun, checking out your local bowling establishment could be the way to go. I swear you'll probably be taken back to your youth and really enjoy yourself. And unlike golf, which can drive a person to madness and anger after just a few holes, bowling gives everyone a chance to do well. You might not roll 200's regularly, but everyone can string 3-6 strikes, or pick up a nice split, occasionally. Plus, it's something that's great for a first date, or a family night out, or some friendly sporting competition between you and your buds. Give bowling a try again. You'll thank me later.
Why? You KNOW why!! Because LEN IS RIGHT!!
See you soon.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Saturday, November 17, 2007
TURKEY TRAVEL AND OLD WOOD
Minions of mine!!
I hope the weekend finds you all well and healthy. So...how many of you are travelling out of town for Thanksgiving? This is the busiest travel weekend of the year, even moreso than Christmas. You'll be hard-pressed to find any discount tickets, plane or train.
When I was a kid, we used to travel from Albany to Utica for T-Day at my grandmother's house. Do any of you from the Northeast remember the blizzard and 2-feet of snow on Thanksgiving in the early 70's? It took my father 5 hours to drive what usually takes 1 1/2 hours. Knock wood, we haven't had any serious snowfall in November in a bunch of years. It seems that the snow doesn't really start hammering around here till mid December, if at all.
Anyway, if you ARE travelling, please be careful and try to keep a positive attitude. Long lines, both at the ticket window or on the highways can get under people's skin. By keeping positive and trying to smile when situations become a pain in the ass, you'd be surprised on how much better a time you'll have when you get to your destination. Enjoy the day.
OLD WOOD AT THE ROADHOUSE
This coming Friday evening (after 9:00), I'll be joining Roy the G. B. King and whoever else shows up at Cheer's Roadhouse on Fuller Rd. in Colonie, to see our friend Jeff the Palooka's band, Old Wood. They play covers of stuff from the 60's to present-day. You'll hear anything from ZZ Top, Santana, The Allman Brothers, to stuff by John Mayer, Matchbox 20, and the like. They have a pretty good following of friends and family in the crowd, and since it's the night after Thanksgiving, I'm sure the joint will be rockin'. For once, they're playing on a Friday night. They usually are out on Saturdays, which limits me because I have to go to work at 12:00 and can only stay for the first set. This time, I'll be able to hang out for a while. Luckilly, the place is a 1 and 1/2 minute drive from my house. I can walk home if I get over-served.
Okay, that's it for now. Just wanted to post and stay in touch. Roy and Chuck have been giving me a hard time for not posting over the last few months. So now, your gonna hear alot of inane shit just to appease those guys...my minions. My brothers. They smartly get on my case, because they have become RIGHT. And you know that to be Right, you need your fix of LEN IS RIGHT!
Peace and be well.
I am,
Len Tollerton
I hope the weekend finds you all well and healthy. So...how many of you are travelling out of town for Thanksgiving? This is the busiest travel weekend of the year, even moreso than Christmas. You'll be hard-pressed to find any discount tickets, plane or train.
When I was a kid, we used to travel from Albany to Utica for T-Day at my grandmother's house. Do any of you from the Northeast remember the blizzard and 2-feet of snow on Thanksgiving in the early 70's? It took my father 5 hours to drive what usually takes 1 1/2 hours. Knock wood, we haven't had any serious snowfall in November in a bunch of years. It seems that the snow doesn't really start hammering around here till mid December, if at all.
Anyway, if you ARE travelling, please be careful and try to keep a positive attitude. Long lines, both at the ticket window or on the highways can get under people's skin. By keeping positive and trying to smile when situations become a pain in the ass, you'd be surprised on how much better a time you'll have when you get to your destination. Enjoy the day.
OLD WOOD AT THE ROADHOUSE
This coming Friday evening (after 9:00), I'll be joining Roy the G. B. King and whoever else shows up at Cheer's Roadhouse on Fuller Rd. in Colonie, to see our friend Jeff the Palooka's band, Old Wood. They play covers of stuff from the 60's to present-day. You'll hear anything from ZZ Top, Santana, The Allman Brothers, to stuff by John Mayer, Matchbox 20, and the like. They have a pretty good following of friends and family in the crowd, and since it's the night after Thanksgiving, I'm sure the joint will be rockin'. For once, they're playing on a Friday night. They usually are out on Saturdays, which limits me because I have to go to work at 12:00 and can only stay for the first set. This time, I'll be able to hang out for a while. Luckilly, the place is a 1 and 1/2 minute drive from my house. I can walk home if I get over-served.
Okay, that's it for now. Just wanted to post and stay in touch. Roy and Chuck have been giving me a hard time for not posting over the last few months. So now, your gonna hear alot of inane shit just to appease those guys...my minions. My brothers. They smartly get on my case, because they have become RIGHT. And you know that to be Right, you need your fix of LEN IS RIGHT!
Peace and be well.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
DONE IN BY THE LUCE CONNECTION
Helloooo Minions:
Back after a 4 month hiatus to spew some of the good, the bad, and the questionable. In truth, I haven't written in quite a while for two reasons. First, I suffered from a type of writer's block. Specifically, I would get an idea while away from my computer and forget it later on. Or, I would just not have anything to say.
Secondly, I've experienced a sort of "world-weariness" over the last few months. Some may even call it depression, though I don't feel depressed. You know when you get out of your car when you arrive at work, and you look at the building and heave a heavy "UGH," well, that's how I've been feeling about the world.
The state of the Nation, gasoline prices, layoffs and no contract, still, at Amtrak, and a bit of a falling out with a parent (my Mom), led me to just not want to write anything. I decided to keep it inside, not wanting to bore you with my shit. Besides, I didn't think I could mine it for much comedy.
However, this last weekend's events have prompted me to jot a few things down, remind you I'm still here, and send KUDOs to a couple of friends. So here goes:
THE LUCE CONNECTION
Last Saturday I played in a poker tournament at the Eye-Oh-Nay household. I've played in 4 tourneys there, winning the first one, but not faring that well since. And it looked like more of the same, as I was down close to the felt a couple of times and was able to double-up on a couple of All-Ins and keep grinding away. Finally made the Final Table, but was playing against Roy, the G.B. King. Roy is considered by most in our circle of poker playing friends as the best tournament player (probably followed closely by Fred the Stat King).
Roy came to the table as one of the chip leaders, but suffered a few losses and was down to the felt (not many chips left) a couple of times. But as is his way, he made his patented Lazarus-like comeback, and we were both able to survive as players were eliminated. After the two of us DEVASTATED the stack of the homeowner's best friend (Roy and I are his albatrosses), Roy and I end up as the last two guys standing.
Roy excells at heads-up play. He goes All-In alot, pushing it to make you think he's got something so you'll fold, or he really does have something and you just lose outright. After alot of back and forth, I look down at a pair of pocket 7's. I raise the bet and Roy comes over the top and goes All-In. I call, figuring it's a coin toss, unless he's got a higher pair. Roy's got me in chips, roughly 34,000 to 32,000. He flips over Ace-Jack. He doesn't pair the board, but I don't improve either, though I still lead. The River (last card) brings a 10, which completed a Straight for Roy and we were done. Kudos to Roy. He made $300 more than I did ($550-$250). I thought the difference between 1st and 2nd Place money was VERY skewed, seeing as it can all come down to a coin-toss at the end with one guy walking away just being lucky. But no worries. I did alot better than I anticipated and enjoyed the game. Hopefully, I'll get him next time. But wait.....there's more. This wasn't the only time I got Luced this weekend.
Roy's younger brother, Chuck the E.O.D., was my opponent in Fantasy Football. Chuck and I are good friends, but arch-nemeses in the fantasy league. On paper, my team is way better. However, this week on the field, Chuck's team came through, with the help of Dallas QB Tony Romo, with an 84-82 victory. Do you think I could have gotten just a few more yards out of my RB's? Or maybe not have my QB throw 2 interceptions, which cost me 2 points. Or maybe, I could start the right REC's. Nope, and now my season is effectively DONE. At 4-6 with 3 games to play, I have to run the table just to contend for a Wild Card spot. I can do it, but I'll need alot of help from other teams who must lose. Being the Commissioner of the League makes me a bit of a target, and the guys love it when I miss the playoffs...which doesn't happen often.
Anyway.....I owe a big shit sandwich to the Luce Bros., who saw fit to put it up my rear end this weekend. Good thing we're friends, ya bastids.
2008 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION
Look, even if you voted for G.W.Bush twice, you gotta admit that his administration and 2nd term have been a shambles. Do you understand we're paying $3 and twenty-something cents for a gallon of gas? He doesn't set the prices, but influences what they are by his policies. Phone conversations monitored, American soldiers dying every day for what?, not allowing gay marriage (if you're against this, then you need to come back to reality and let people live their lives), a government based on religious, Christian fundamentalism, spending BILLIONS on a war we can't win, yet taking money away from domestic programs and AMERICAN people. You and your administration have betrayed the trust of your Nation. You have let us down. You should be thrown in jail or trampled by a thundering herd of elephants after being dragged through a field of cow manure behind a Department of Sanitation truck. At a very high speed. It's time for you to go, George. Go...NOW.
THANKS FOR YOUR PATIENCE
I don't know how often it will be, but I think I'm ready to correspond with the minions again. Hopefully, you'll forgive my laxity and give me another shot. Doing so would make YOU right, which makes it so LEN IS RIGHT .
Talk to you soon. January 20, 2009 is not that far away.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Back after a 4 month hiatus to spew some of the good, the bad, and the questionable. In truth, I haven't written in quite a while for two reasons. First, I suffered from a type of writer's block. Specifically, I would get an idea while away from my computer and forget it later on. Or, I would just not have anything to say.
Secondly, I've experienced a sort of "world-weariness" over the last few months. Some may even call it depression, though I don't feel depressed. You know when you get out of your car when you arrive at work, and you look at the building and heave a heavy "UGH," well, that's how I've been feeling about the world.
The state of the Nation, gasoline prices, layoffs and no contract, still, at Amtrak, and a bit of a falling out with a parent (my Mom), led me to just not want to write anything. I decided to keep it inside, not wanting to bore you with my shit. Besides, I didn't think I could mine it for much comedy.
However, this last weekend's events have prompted me to jot a few things down, remind you I'm still here, and send KUDOs to a couple of friends. So here goes:
THE LUCE CONNECTION
Last Saturday I played in a poker tournament at the Eye-Oh-Nay household. I've played in 4 tourneys there, winning the first one, but not faring that well since. And it looked like more of the same, as I was down close to the felt a couple of times and was able to double-up on a couple of All-Ins and keep grinding away. Finally made the Final Table, but was playing against Roy, the G.B. King. Roy is considered by most in our circle of poker playing friends as the best tournament player (probably followed closely by Fred the Stat King).
Roy came to the table as one of the chip leaders, but suffered a few losses and was down to the felt (not many chips left) a couple of times. But as is his way, he made his patented Lazarus-like comeback, and we were both able to survive as players were eliminated. After the two of us DEVASTATED the stack of the homeowner's best friend (Roy and I are his albatrosses), Roy and I end up as the last two guys standing.
Roy excells at heads-up play. He goes All-In alot, pushing it to make you think he's got something so you'll fold, or he really does have something and you just lose outright. After alot of back and forth, I look down at a pair of pocket 7's. I raise the bet and Roy comes over the top and goes All-In. I call, figuring it's a coin toss, unless he's got a higher pair. Roy's got me in chips, roughly 34,000 to 32,000. He flips over Ace-Jack. He doesn't pair the board, but I don't improve either, though I still lead. The River (last card) brings a 10, which completed a Straight for Roy and we were done. Kudos to Roy. He made $300 more than I did ($550-$250). I thought the difference between 1st and 2nd Place money was VERY skewed, seeing as it can all come down to a coin-toss at the end with one guy walking away just being lucky. But no worries. I did alot better than I anticipated and enjoyed the game. Hopefully, I'll get him next time. But wait.....there's more. This wasn't the only time I got Luced this weekend.
Roy's younger brother, Chuck the E.O.D., was my opponent in Fantasy Football. Chuck and I are good friends, but arch-nemeses in the fantasy league. On paper, my team is way better. However, this week on the field, Chuck's team came through, with the help of Dallas QB Tony Romo, with an 84-82 victory. Do you think I could have gotten just a few more yards out of my RB's? Or maybe not have my QB throw 2 interceptions, which cost me 2 points. Or maybe, I could start the right REC's. Nope, and now my season is effectively DONE. At 4-6 with 3 games to play, I have to run the table just to contend for a Wild Card spot. I can do it, but I'll need alot of help from other teams who must lose. Being the Commissioner of the League makes me a bit of a target, and the guys love it when I miss the playoffs...which doesn't happen often.
Anyway.....I owe a big shit sandwich to the Luce Bros., who saw fit to put it up my rear end this weekend. Good thing we're friends, ya bastids.
2008 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION
Look, even if you voted for G.W.Bush twice, you gotta admit that his administration and 2nd term have been a shambles. Do you understand we're paying $3 and twenty-something cents for a gallon of gas? He doesn't set the prices, but influences what they are by his policies. Phone conversations monitored, American soldiers dying every day for what?, not allowing gay marriage (if you're against this, then you need to come back to reality and let people live their lives), a government based on religious, Christian fundamentalism, spending BILLIONS on a war we can't win, yet taking money away from domestic programs and AMERICAN people. You and your administration have betrayed the trust of your Nation. You have let us down. You should be thrown in jail or trampled by a thundering herd of elephants after being dragged through a field of cow manure behind a Department of Sanitation truck. At a very high speed. It's time for you to go, George. Go...NOW.
THANKS FOR YOUR PATIENCE
I don't know how often it will be, but I think I'm ready to correspond with the minions again. Hopefully, you'll forgive my laxity and give me another shot. Doing so would make YOU right, which makes it so LEN IS RIGHT .
Talk to you soon. January 20, 2009 is not that far away.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
HOW YOU DOIN' Part three
Hey Now:
Here is Part 3 of the first blog post in over a month.
FAREWELL TO BVA
Our very good friend, Mr. Brian Van Alstyne, of Rensselaer and Colonie, has decided to transfer to Amtrak in Sanford, Florida (near Orlando), which is one of the stops of the AutoTrain. Brian is a wry studier of life and enjoys the little (or tremendously huge) quirks he observes in folks over a period of time. He's one of those guys that you work with that does dead-on impressions of co-workers. He generally does these as asides to friends, making them bust a gut with laughter. Brian is a great guy to have around, whether golfing, drinking, attending sporting events, whatever. Brian is funny in that, even though we consider him a good friend, he likes to keep a distance and a major part of himself to himself.
As a worker, Brian has too much brains for the job he is doing. He could be making alot more money doing something in the private sector. But like some of us, he is either too complacent, too comfortable, too lazy, or too apathetic to go out and find more. I really believe that you don't need success in business, vocation, or your monetary situation to be an actual success. I think happiness is more important. I think guys like Brian, Roy, Rob, and myself are able to get themselves to a point where you can say, "No. I don't have all the money I'd like, but, Yes, I'm happy with what I have, my family, the friends I hang out with, and the things that I do.
I think Brian will always be like that. Brian's love above all is Horse Racing. I think he and Chuck the E.o D. would make a good television analyst team for the OTB network. I think a perfect day for Brian would be a morning round of golf at Hiawatha Trails (a tough Par-3 course near here), Lunch and all the festivities at Saratoga Race Course, followed by a quick trip to the Bronx to watch his beloved Yankees kick the shit out of the Red Sox. Or the NY Giants NOT getting their asses handed to them by someone from the NFC EAST.
Brian, you are truly one of the most interesting people I have ever met. Your view askew of the world, along with your unique insights have given me alot to think about and alot to laugh about. I always have fun playing golf with you and will never forget the day you got hit by Grugan's shot. I will also never forget "entertaining you" by trying to hit the ball out of the water on the 11th hole at Schenctady Muni. There are people that you are happy to see when you go into work. For me, Brian is one of them. A voice of reason (except when discussing baseball and rock music), a bringer of humor, and an understanding ear. Roy, Rob, Tim, Jeff the Palooka, and I will miss you alot. I think so will Rich, even though he can't "hit his iyahns."
I wish you all the best in the Orlando area. Please don't marry Vicki. I'm sure there is some hot Florida mommy with an oddly bent view of the world who you'll hook up with down there. Peace and Happiness my friend.
I know Brian will do well, because LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Here is Part 3 of the first blog post in over a month.
FAREWELL TO BVA
Our very good friend, Mr. Brian Van Alstyne, of Rensselaer and Colonie, has decided to transfer to Amtrak in Sanford, Florida (near Orlando), which is one of the stops of the AutoTrain. Brian is a wry studier of life and enjoys the little (or tremendously huge) quirks he observes in folks over a period of time. He's one of those guys that you work with that does dead-on impressions of co-workers. He generally does these as asides to friends, making them bust a gut with laughter. Brian is a great guy to have around, whether golfing, drinking, attending sporting events, whatever. Brian is funny in that, even though we consider him a good friend, he likes to keep a distance and a major part of himself to himself.
As a worker, Brian has too much brains for the job he is doing. He could be making alot more money doing something in the private sector. But like some of us, he is either too complacent, too comfortable, too lazy, or too apathetic to go out and find more. I really believe that you don't need success in business, vocation, or your monetary situation to be an actual success. I think happiness is more important. I think guys like Brian, Roy, Rob, and myself are able to get themselves to a point where you can say, "No. I don't have all the money I'd like, but, Yes, I'm happy with what I have, my family, the friends I hang out with, and the things that I do.
I think Brian will always be like that. Brian's love above all is Horse Racing. I think he and Chuck the E.o D. would make a good television analyst team for the OTB network. I think a perfect day for Brian would be a morning round of golf at Hiawatha Trails (a tough Par-3 course near here), Lunch and all the festivities at Saratoga Race Course, followed by a quick trip to the Bronx to watch his beloved Yankees kick the shit out of the Red Sox. Or the NY Giants NOT getting their asses handed to them by someone from the NFC EAST.
Brian, you are truly one of the most interesting people I have ever met. Your view askew of the world, along with your unique insights have given me alot to think about and alot to laugh about. I always have fun playing golf with you and will never forget the day you got hit by Grugan's shot. I will also never forget "entertaining you" by trying to hit the ball out of the water on the 11th hole at Schenctady Muni. There are people that you are happy to see when you go into work. For me, Brian is one of them. A voice of reason (except when discussing baseball and rock music), a bringer of humor, and an understanding ear. Roy, Rob, Tim, Jeff the Palooka, and I will miss you alot. I think so will Rich, even though he can't "hit his iyahns."
I wish you all the best in the Orlando area. Please don't marry Vicki. I'm sure there is some hot Florida mommy with an oddly bent view of the world who you'll hook up with down there. Peace and Happiness my friend.
I know Brian will do well, because LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
HOW YOU DOIN'? Part two
Alright here's some more:
I split these up so you didn't have to read one long post. You could take it as you wanted. Anyway...
THE STORM AND THE TREE
The day before golf, we get this tornado-like wind and hail storm on my way to work at 4:00. I get the call from home that wind has blown down a tree from an adjacent property and taken down our power lines (and our neighbor's). We have no power, no phone (because we have Time Warner digital phone), can't get in our driveway. Not to mention that it's, like, 87 degrees, and there's no air conditioning. Plus, no power to run the sump pump in the basement. I leave work and come home. Power company ends up coming by 4 times and telling us they'll need a crew (no duh). 25 hours later, with Patty at the end of her rope, the power people finally show up and reattach in less that 1 hour. This would not have happened if Patty had not been extremely assertive on the phone with NIMO.
So we're all hooked up (power, phone, and cable), but we still have an 80-90 foot tree lying across two yards. So, Saturday I'm mowing my back lawn and notice the neighbor trying to cut some of the smaller branches wih a hand saw. Then, Don across the street, comes over with his electric chain saw. Then another couple shows up and then the widow from across the street (who we shovel out occasionally) comes over. So we're all working along. Just as I leave for Jackson's soccer game, Super John from down the street shows up with his "real" chainsaw and cuts the tree back to my lawn so I can get in my driveway.
Another guy (from the Eddie Burgess-group) comes up with a guy who's looking for firewood. I just want the tree gone. So, it's taken several trips over a few days, but we finally got the yard back so it's usable. I just have to vaccuum up wood chips before my lawn is a total mess.
Thanks to the Owens', Don and Charlotte Van Keuren, Mary Mancuso, the Trainors, and Super John from down the street for all of your help. Thanks also to Paul for doing all of the cutting and hauling. The town wouldn't take the branches.
AMTRAK GETS WORSE
As hard as it is to believe, things at Amtrak Rensselaer got worse this week. Our Chief Mechanical Officer came and told us that the P.M. work we do on a certain line of engines was being moved to Chicago, where they want to centralize the work and inventory for the program. They have no problem with the quality of our work. Business-wise, it's a smart move. Unfortunately, it's going to cause us to lose 22 jobs. 16 of those will be people retiring whose jobs they will not fill. The other 6 are actual jobse we will lose. It doesn't seem like alot, but when you only have 153 and they want you down to 131, it is alot. Never mind that we had 200-300 people at one time.
My craft of 10 workers was reduced by 2 in this move. This was done because management doesn't like the man who was second-from-the-bottom on our roster. See, our local management manages with the style of VINDICTIVENESS AND DEGRADATION. The guy who makes the rules and schedules has admitted that if he is mad at one guy, he likes to punsih the WHOLE craft. How do you like that? I won't go too far into the other archaic and childish things they do and say to and about the workers, because I could write for hours. Suffice to say that it is an abominable place to be, and I am physically nauseated when I am in their presence.
You COULD say, "Len, if you hate it there so much and it sucks to be there, why don't you leave?" No diploma. Golden hand-cuffs (decent pay and can't aford to risk being without benefits). Not enough money saved to allow for flexibility of not working at this time. I should probably go and get my Real Estate license, even with the market being bad right now. I actually figured I'd retire with the railroad. My job is safe for now, but it's only a matter of time. Amtrak is going to, over the next few years, turn the Rensselaer Maintenence Facility into a gas station. The trains will come in, get fueled, toilets serviced, cleaned and sent out. No mechanical repairs will be made.
You know, it's bad enough that we haven't gotten a contract for almost 8 years (no raise and gasoline costs over $3.oo/gal), but to have jobs abolished and a local management that will not communicate "en masse" to the employees, and operates on the, "You're lucky to have a job" mentality, is a kick in the teeth. I find myself often wishing for the embarassing and painful death of those in control. And then I think, "Hey, what kind of thinking is that?" So, I guess I'm going to put a resume together and see what's out there that I can do that will pay me what I'm making now. No construction work. I freaking hate it. I need a large comapny to hire me as a liason to big-wigs who come into town. That would be good for me. HIRE LEN IS RIGHT, NOW. YOU WON'T BE SORRY.
You know what, though? I'm healthy. I have a nice family. Things could be alot worse. I at least have the ABILITY to take care of my family. If I have to end up working 2 jobs and 60-80 hours to make the same money as I'm paid at Amtrak, I'll do it. Fuck Amtrak. You're not going to beat me. In the end, the upper hand will be mine AND I WILL PISS ON YOUR SHOES, YA BASTIDS!!
This ends Part Two. Part 3 to follow. LEN IS RIGHT. ACCEPT IT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
I split these up so you didn't have to read one long post. You could take it as you wanted. Anyway...
THE STORM AND THE TREE
The day before golf, we get this tornado-like wind and hail storm on my way to work at 4:00. I get the call from home that wind has blown down a tree from an adjacent property and taken down our power lines (and our neighbor's). We have no power, no phone (because we have Time Warner digital phone), can't get in our driveway. Not to mention that it's, like, 87 degrees, and there's no air conditioning. Plus, no power to run the sump pump in the basement. I leave work and come home. Power company ends up coming by 4 times and telling us they'll need a crew (no duh). 25 hours later, with Patty at the end of her rope, the power people finally show up and reattach in less that 1 hour. This would not have happened if Patty had not been extremely assertive on the phone with NIMO.
So we're all hooked up (power, phone, and cable), but we still have an 80-90 foot tree lying across two yards. So, Saturday I'm mowing my back lawn and notice the neighbor trying to cut some of the smaller branches wih a hand saw. Then, Don across the street, comes over with his electric chain saw. Then another couple shows up and then the widow from across the street (who we shovel out occasionally) comes over. So we're all working along. Just as I leave for Jackson's soccer game, Super John from down the street shows up with his "real" chainsaw and cuts the tree back to my lawn so I can get in my driveway.
Another guy (from the Eddie Burgess-group) comes up with a guy who's looking for firewood. I just want the tree gone. So, it's taken several trips over a few days, but we finally got the yard back so it's usable. I just have to vaccuum up wood chips before my lawn is a total mess.
Thanks to the Owens', Don and Charlotte Van Keuren, Mary Mancuso, the Trainors, and Super John from down the street for all of your help. Thanks also to Paul for doing all of the cutting and hauling. The town wouldn't take the branches.
AMTRAK GETS WORSE
As hard as it is to believe, things at Amtrak Rensselaer got worse this week. Our Chief Mechanical Officer came and told us that the P.M. work we do on a certain line of engines was being moved to Chicago, where they want to centralize the work and inventory for the program. They have no problem with the quality of our work. Business-wise, it's a smart move. Unfortunately, it's going to cause us to lose 22 jobs. 16 of those will be people retiring whose jobs they will not fill. The other 6 are actual jobse we will lose. It doesn't seem like alot, but when you only have 153 and they want you down to 131, it is alot. Never mind that we had 200-300 people at one time.
My craft of 10 workers was reduced by 2 in this move. This was done because management doesn't like the man who was second-from-the-bottom on our roster. See, our local management manages with the style of VINDICTIVENESS AND DEGRADATION. The guy who makes the rules and schedules has admitted that if he is mad at one guy, he likes to punsih the WHOLE craft. How do you like that? I won't go too far into the other archaic and childish things they do and say to and about the workers, because I could write for hours. Suffice to say that it is an abominable place to be, and I am physically nauseated when I am in their presence.
You COULD say, "Len, if you hate it there so much and it sucks to be there, why don't you leave?" No diploma. Golden hand-cuffs (decent pay and can't aford to risk being without benefits). Not enough money saved to allow for flexibility of not working at this time. I should probably go and get my Real Estate license, even with the market being bad right now. I actually figured I'd retire with the railroad. My job is safe for now, but it's only a matter of time. Amtrak is going to, over the next few years, turn the Rensselaer Maintenence Facility into a gas station. The trains will come in, get fueled, toilets serviced, cleaned and sent out. No mechanical repairs will be made.
You know, it's bad enough that we haven't gotten a contract for almost 8 years (no raise and gasoline costs over $3.oo/gal), but to have jobs abolished and a local management that will not communicate "en masse" to the employees, and operates on the, "You're lucky to have a job" mentality, is a kick in the teeth. I find myself often wishing for the embarassing and painful death of those in control. And then I think, "Hey, what kind of thinking is that?" So, I guess I'm going to put a resume together and see what's out there that I can do that will pay me what I'm making now. No construction work. I freaking hate it. I need a large comapny to hire me as a liason to big-wigs who come into town. That would be good for me. HIRE LEN IS RIGHT, NOW. YOU WON'T BE SORRY.
You know what, though? I'm healthy. I have a nice family. Things could be alot worse. I at least have the ABILITY to take care of my family. If I have to end up working 2 jobs and 60-80 hours to make the same money as I'm paid at Amtrak, I'll do it. Fuck Amtrak. You're not going to beat me. In the end, the upper hand will be mine AND I WILL PISS ON YOUR SHOES, YA BASTIDS!!
This ends Part Two. Part 3 to follow. LEN IS RIGHT. ACCEPT IT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
HOW YOU DOIN? Part One
Hey:
Been away. Nothing to say. Events of the past month, in no particular order.
LOSS OF A FRIEND
Good friend Ed Burgess finally lost his fight with cancer. Ed, along with his wife, Mary, hosted the (in)famous Daytona Ave. Texas Hold-'Em tournaments I've spoken about. Good friend, good guy. Eddie was one of the better tournament poker players in the Capital District area. He was the first back-to-back winner at the Albany Garden Club's weekly tournament. He was also the winner of the first two Daytona Ave. tourneys. The Amtrak guys, the poker guys, the guards, family and friends will miss him greatly. Vaya Con Dios, mi amigo.
THE PRINTERS' GOLF OUTING
June 1st brought us to the greatly anticipated Printers' outing, a four-man scramble format golf outing at Orchard Creek in Altamont. I played with Roy, the G.B. King, the Dot-Com Destroyer and our host, Chuck, the famous Edge of Darkness. We got off to a great start, making birdies on the first 4 holes (including a Closest-to-the-Pin 12'9"/189 yard Par3 by yours truly), 7 out of the first 9, and 9 out of the first 13. Unfortunately we ran out of gas and couldn't sink a putt later on and ended up making par on the last 5 holes. We finished with a 9-Under 62, a true team effort, especially over the first 13 holes. Everyone's shot was used at least once in all 4 types of shots (driving, fairway, chips and putts). Our 62 was good enough for 2nd place, losing to a 60. We really should have won it.
In between 9's, the outing had a guy grilling ribs, Sabretts, and sausage and peppers. Beer on tap and all manner of soft drinks available. After the golf, we had a cocktail 2-hour with fresh shrimp, clams, and clam chowder. We took the opportunity to play a little No-Limit in 3 Styles (Hold-'Em, Omaha, and Pineapple). I lostEnded up losing $23. Was down $60. They then gave out raffle prizes and put on a steak bake with all the trimmings. Great time. We played good golf, got hammered, played cards, and ate great food. We also won money for 2nd place and I won a Closest-to-Pin prize. We couldn't have asked for more. These outing are always alot more fun if you play well.
Well that's enough for this post. A second one follows.
LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Been away. Nothing to say. Events of the past month, in no particular order.
LOSS OF A FRIEND
Good friend Ed Burgess finally lost his fight with cancer. Ed, along with his wife, Mary, hosted the (in)famous Daytona Ave. Texas Hold-'Em tournaments I've spoken about. Good friend, good guy. Eddie was one of the better tournament poker players in the Capital District area. He was the first back-to-back winner at the Albany Garden Club's weekly tournament. He was also the winner of the first two Daytona Ave. tourneys. The Amtrak guys, the poker guys, the guards, family and friends will miss him greatly. Vaya Con Dios, mi amigo.
THE PRINTERS' GOLF OUTING
June 1st brought us to the greatly anticipated Printers' outing, a four-man scramble format golf outing at Orchard Creek in Altamont. I played with Roy, the G.B. King, the Dot-Com Destroyer and our host, Chuck, the famous Edge of Darkness. We got off to a great start, making birdies on the first 4 holes (including a Closest-to-the-Pin 12'9"/189 yard Par3 by yours truly), 7 out of the first 9, and 9 out of the first 13. Unfortunately we ran out of gas and couldn't sink a putt later on and ended up making par on the last 5 holes. We finished with a 9-Under 62, a true team effort, especially over the first 13 holes. Everyone's shot was used at least once in all 4 types of shots (driving, fairway, chips and putts). Our 62 was good enough for 2nd place, losing to a 60. We really should have won it.
In between 9's, the outing had a guy grilling ribs, Sabretts, and sausage and peppers. Beer on tap and all manner of soft drinks available. After the golf, we had a cocktail 2-hour with fresh shrimp, clams, and clam chowder. We took the opportunity to play a little No-Limit in 3 Styles (Hold-'Em, Omaha, and Pineapple). I lostEnded up losing $23. Was down $60. They then gave out raffle prizes and put on a steak bake with all the trimmings. Great time. We played good golf, got hammered, played cards, and ate great food. We also won money for 2nd place and I won a Closest-to-Pin prize. We couldn't have asked for more. These outing are always alot more fun if you play well.
Well that's enough for this post. A second one follows.
LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
HYPE AND SPECULATION
Hello people:
Sorry for the abscence. Nothing interesting to write about. Figure you don't really want to be bothered with a blog about my daily activities. But not to worry. I've found something worthy of comment....at least, before I go insane.
This is a revisiting of a topic I may have discussed before. I firmly believe that media hype and speculation is one of the reasons that our country and our world is in the shape it's in.
THE NFL DRAFT AND SPIDERMAN 3
Is it any wonder that MORE people don't go postal, with the inundation of hype in our country? I mean, last weekend's NFL Draft, like everything else, was hyped to the max for 2 weeks leading up to it. And the premier of Spiderman 3 this coming weekend, with it's product placement and merchandising, makes you wonder if you even want to see the movie. Of course, we all will.
Now, I realize that everything in our free-capitalist society is based on being able to sell. Hype and PR is what moves products, puts people in the seats at major events, sells you a service, etc... But doesn't it seem that oftentimes the end product doesn't live up to the hype? Aren't we all a little tired of people yelling at you to buy their goods. "THE PRODUCTS WILL BE FLYING OFF THE SHELVES! THE ACTION WILL BE HOT, HEAVY, AND EXCITING! GET THERE EARLY! YOU DON'T WANT TO BE LATE! THE WINTER-SPRING, TURBO, MEGA, HUUUUUGE, ALL-OUT, ALL-IN, LAST CHANCE GOING-OUT-OF-BUSINESS-FOR-THE-LAST-TIME, NATIONAL! NATIONAL! NATIONALS!!!! SALE!!!!! ONCE IT'S OVER, IT'S OVER!" (in small print on the bottom of screen..."until next month")
And the only thing we can do about it is turn the channel, turn the page, turn it off. We'll never be able to get it to stop because HYPE works. That's the bottom line. We're all, most of us, a bunch of sheep. I'll say it again. WE'RE ALL A BUNCH OF SHEEP. We allow ourselves to get worked up by hype. And why? BECAUSE WE'RE ALL DREAMERS. We hope that the hype of what they're selling is all it's cracked up to be and we can say to our friends and neighbors, "See how smart I am. I made the smart choice, just like millions of others. Why haven't you?"
Is there any hope at all that they can turn down the volume? Can we reduce the inundation so we can think and be at peace for just a few minutes?
SPECULATION
The NFL Draft is the perfect example of the Ills of Speculation. After getting hyped by Mel Kiper Jr. for 2 weeks before the draft, we also have to listen to all of the other experts come in and analyze the talent as if they were scouts themselves. "We think he's a Blue-Chipper for sure. A definite star and maybe Hall-Of-Famer in our midst. A Can't Miss." Unfortunately, they missed the fact that from 8th grade through Freshman year at college, the guy had at least one yearly arrest for violence or sexual assault. A week into the Regular season the guys is arrested for DWI, possesion of fire arms, a bag of crack, with 2 15-year-old hookers who've been pistol whipped and tied up in the back of his car. The police later find out the dude was on his way to hang them in a meat locker.
Even when the Speculation is right (in the case of Peyton Manning), it's all a guess. It's the same with politics and Elections. Speculation as to who will win, what the plan is, what will happen if this occurs, or what happens if the opposite occurs. How about just coming on and tersely giving a short list of Pros and Cons and knocking off all of the embellishment and blather. Jesus, you fuckers can be seriously long-winded when it comes to giving the skinny.
It is said that is better to focus on a Solution rather than dwell on the Problem when something negative occurs. The faster we can fix, mend, or find a new path to success, the better.
Give me the Facts. If you have to, show me, both, the Ups and Downs to the sides of the Issue, then let me decide, or let me watch it play out. In short, Hype + Speculation = Bullshit. The Inundation of Information at a level of Constant Barrage will be a big factor in the downfall of humans. In fact it already is. And you know that LEN IS RIGHT.
Please be at peace and try to relax in this Mad World.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Sorry for the abscence. Nothing interesting to write about. Figure you don't really want to be bothered with a blog about my daily activities. But not to worry. I've found something worthy of comment....at least, before I go insane.
This is a revisiting of a topic I may have discussed before. I firmly believe that media hype and speculation is one of the reasons that our country and our world is in the shape it's in.
THE NFL DRAFT AND SPIDERMAN 3
Is it any wonder that MORE people don't go postal, with the inundation of hype in our country? I mean, last weekend's NFL Draft, like everything else, was hyped to the max for 2 weeks leading up to it. And the premier of Spiderman 3 this coming weekend, with it's product placement and merchandising, makes you wonder if you even want to see the movie. Of course, we all will.
Now, I realize that everything in our free-capitalist society is based on being able to sell. Hype and PR is what moves products, puts people in the seats at major events, sells you a service, etc... But doesn't it seem that oftentimes the end product doesn't live up to the hype? Aren't we all a little tired of people yelling at you to buy their goods. "THE PRODUCTS WILL BE FLYING OFF THE SHELVES! THE ACTION WILL BE HOT, HEAVY, AND EXCITING! GET THERE EARLY! YOU DON'T WANT TO BE LATE! THE WINTER-SPRING, TURBO, MEGA, HUUUUUGE, ALL-OUT, ALL-IN, LAST CHANCE GOING-OUT-OF-BUSINESS-FOR-THE-LAST-TIME, NATIONAL! NATIONAL! NATIONALS!!!! SALE!!!!! ONCE IT'S OVER, IT'S OVER!" (in small print on the bottom of screen..."until next month")
And the only thing we can do about it is turn the channel, turn the page, turn it off. We'll never be able to get it to stop because HYPE works. That's the bottom line. We're all, most of us, a bunch of sheep. I'll say it again. WE'RE ALL A BUNCH OF SHEEP. We allow ourselves to get worked up by hype. And why? BECAUSE WE'RE ALL DREAMERS. We hope that the hype of what they're selling is all it's cracked up to be and we can say to our friends and neighbors, "See how smart I am. I made the smart choice, just like millions of others. Why haven't you?"
Is there any hope at all that they can turn down the volume? Can we reduce the inundation so we can think and be at peace for just a few minutes?
SPECULATION
The NFL Draft is the perfect example of the Ills of Speculation. After getting hyped by Mel Kiper Jr. for 2 weeks before the draft, we also have to listen to all of the other experts come in and analyze the talent as if they were scouts themselves. "We think he's a Blue-Chipper for sure. A definite star and maybe Hall-Of-Famer in our midst. A Can't Miss." Unfortunately, they missed the fact that from 8th grade through Freshman year at college, the guy had at least one yearly arrest for violence or sexual assault. A week into the Regular season the guys is arrested for DWI, possesion of fire arms, a bag of crack, with 2 15-year-old hookers who've been pistol whipped and tied up in the back of his car. The police later find out the dude was on his way to hang them in a meat locker.
Even when the Speculation is right (in the case of Peyton Manning), it's all a guess. It's the same with politics and Elections. Speculation as to who will win, what the plan is, what will happen if this occurs, or what happens if the opposite occurs. How about just coming on and tersely giving a short list of Pros and Cons and knocking off all of the embellishment and blather. Jesus, you fuckers can be seriously long-winded when it comes to giving the skinny.
It is said that is better to focus on a Solution rather than dwell on the Problem when something negative occurs. The faster we can fix, mend, or find a new path to success, the better.
Give me the Facts. If you have to, show me, both, the Ups and Downs to the sides of the Issue, then let me decide, or let me watch it play out. In short, Hype + Speculation = Bullshit. The Inundation of Information at a level of Constant Barrage will be a big factor in the downfall of humans. In fact it already is. And you know that LEN IS RIGHT.
Please be at peace and try to relax in this Mad World.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Monday, April 16, 2007
BACK FROM FLORIDA
Friends-O-Mine:
I have returned from a somewhat unsatisfying vacation in the supposed-to-be sunny state of Florida. This was the 6th year we've gone down to spend time with the lovely Patty's Dad and his wife Aggie in the Tampa area. Unfortunately, this year was the worst we've had it for several reasons that were beyond anyone's control.
I was sick as a dog the night before we left, spending the night alternating between chills and sweats. The next day we had to make a 1 1/2 hour trip to Newburgh's Stewart Airport (to save money on airfare). The flights went alright (a little late departing, but no biggie). We flew on Air Tran, which I must say was very nice for a discount airline. Plenty of room, satellite radio at every seat, and very friendly employees.
After arriving in Tampa and getting to my father-in-law's house, I went right to bed and slept very soundly, though I felt like crap. That was Friday. Sunday, youngest son Jackson got sick, Tuesday, lovely Patty got sick, and Wednesday, older son Connor got sick. Great. PLUS, the weather for the first four days was cold (for FLA) and rainy. By the time the weather got nice everyone else besides me was sick. Wednesday and Thursday were beautiful weather-wise (mid-80's), and I got to play golf with the In-Laws one day then with my father-in-law's buddies the next day. Though I showed flashes of brilliance and had a decent opening nine holes on the second day, I also played horribly the rest of the time. While my father-in-law and his friends are shooting in the mid-70's, I'm struggling to break 100 (I usually shoot in the mid 80's). Totally embarassing. True, I hadn't played a round of golf since October, so there was some rust, but jeesh, I sucked.
It was nice to get away from the Pit of Despair that is Amtrak for a week, so I guess we can find a silver lining in any rain cloud. We've actually had 5 years of glorious weather and fun in FLA, so I guess we have to serve due-diligence and have one vacation go awry once in a while.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WISHES
Gotta give a shout out to close friend Roy the G.B. King who turned 51 on Friday the 13th. Roy celebrated with Chuck the Edge of Darkness, Chris the Dot Com Destroyer, Joe the Dude who Rats Out His Friends To His Wife, and yours truly, playing No-Limit Dealer's Choice poker at Chuck's house. Happy Birthday Roy, and Best Wishes for many more.
That's it for now. Just wanted to check in, let the minions know I was still alive. Send prayers and good wishes to the students, faculty, and families of those at Virginia Tech University, who were shot up today by a deranged idiot with high-powered weapons before killing himself. Nothing but a nightmare and a tragedy. Worse than Columbine. Yet another person who the world is probably better off without. Too bad somebody couldn't have helped him before he went to this extreme.
Be at Peace, people. Len Is Right.
I am,
Len Tollerton
I have returned from a somewhat unsatisfying vacation in the supposed-to-be sunny state of Florida. This was the 6th year we've gone down to spend time with the lovely Patty's Dad and his wife Aggie in the Tampa area. Unfortunately, this year was the worst we've had it for several reasons that were beyond anyone's control.
I was sick as a dog the night before we left, spending the night alternating between chills and sweats. The next day we had to make a 1 1/2 hour trip to Newburgh's Stewart Airport (to save money on airfare). The flights went alright (a little late departing, but no biggie). We flew on Air Tran, which I must say was very nice for a discount airline. Plenty of room, satellite radio at every seat, and very friendly employees.
After arriving in Tampa and getting to my father-in-law's house, I went right to bed and slept very soundly, though I felt like crap. That was Friday. Sunday, youngest son Jackson got sick, Tuesday, lovely Patty got sick, and Wednesday, older son Connor got sick. Great. PLUS, the weather for the first four days was cold (for FLA) and rainy. By the time the weather got nice everyone else besides me was sick. Wednesday and Thursday were beautiful weather-wise (mid-80's), and I got to play golf with the In-Laws one day then with my father-in-law's buddies the next day. Though I showed flashes of brilliance and had a decent opening nine holes on the second day, I also played horribly the rest of the time. While my father-in-law and his friends are shooting in the mid-70's, I'm struggling to break 100 (I usually shoot in the mid 80's). Totally embarassing. True, I hadn't played a round of golf since October, so there was some rust, but jeesh, I sucked.
It was nice to get away from the Pit of Despair that is Amtrak for a week, so I guess we can find a silver lining in any rain cloud. We've actually had 5 years of glorious weather and fun in FLA, so I guess we have to serve due-diligence and have one vacation go awry once in a while.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WISHES
Gotta give a shout out to close friend Roy the G.B. King who turned 51 on Friday the 13th. Roy celebrated with Chuck the Edge of Darkness, Chris the Dot Com Destroyer, Joe the Dude who Rats Out His Friends To His Wife, and yours truly, playing No-Limit Dealer's Choice poker at Chuck's house. Happy Birthday Roy, and Best Wishes for many more.
That's it for now. Just wanted to check in, let the minions know I was still alive. Send prayers and good wishes to the students, faculty, and families of those at Virginia Tech University, who were shot up today by a deranged idiot with high-powered weapons before killing himself. Nothing but a nightmare and a tragedy. Worse than Columbine. Yet another person who the world is probably better off without. Too bad somebody couldn't have helped him before he went to this extreme.
Be at Peace, people. Len Is Right.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Saturday, March 24, 2007
BUDDY...PAL....HON...WTF!!!
My friends:
Today, a pet peeve of mine.
Have you ever been in a diner or restaurant and the waitress calls you hon? You know..."Here you go, hon." Or, "What can I get for you, hon?" The first couple of times you hear it, you're like, "She just called me hon. Is she flirting with me? Can I get a free dessert out of this?" After a while, or after a couple of visits to eateries where the waitress calls you "hon" you realizie it's just something people say instead of sir or madam. When it happens in a restaurant, I don't even give it a second thought. I figure the person is just trying to esablish a familiarity or show friendliness.
HOWEVER......
Recently, I've had dealings with an Insurance Agent who is young and, apparently, just starting out in the business. He often finishes his sentences with, "Okay Buddy?"
Buddy? What the freak is that? Are we friends? No. Do we hang out or something? No. So what makes you think it's okay to call me Buddy? It irks the shit out of me when people act in an unprofessional manner when trying to sell me something or do some kind of business with me. Buddy? Hey, Buddy THIS mofo. Okay? Do I call you dude? When you're trying to do business with me you may call me Sir, Mr. Tollerton, or Len. Buddy? I think NOT!
Which brings me to Pal. Several years ago, I did banking at Trustco Bank on Wolf Rd. in Colonie. There was a teller there by the name of James Vedder, who, while training, and then when he was working on his own, had the annoying habit of calling men Pal. Why are you calling me pal? Are you hoping we're going to establish a friendship and go get a couple of beers together? Are you looking for me to join your hoop team? (Unlikely)
Look, you are in a business where you are in front of the public representing a (supposedly) respectable comapny. How about trying to act in a professional manner and not call the nice customers Buddy, Pal, or Dude. You make yourself look like a dope or a dope smoker. Generally there's nothing wrong with that. Unfortunately, I'm NOT yourBuddy, I'm NOT your Pal, and if we're doing business, I'm definitely NOT Dude. Most of the time I AM Dude. Just not when we're doing business. Got it? Jesus Freakin' Christ, I'm going to smack the next assbag who calls me one of these "endearing" names when they're trying to sell me something or I'm attempting to do some banking.
On second thought, I think I'll just ask them to leave my house, or I'll turn around and leave their establishment so I don't have to put up with that. We ain't friends, we're not familiar, STOP doing it. You know that LEN IS RIGHT, don't you?
BEST OF LUCK AND A SPEEDY RETURN
Mike Wesoloski is a guy I was friends with when I was a teenager. Our sons are on the same bowling team. Mike is in the National Guard and his unit just found out a couple of weeks ago that they'll be shipping off to War in April. He will probably not return till February. His story is no different from the thousands of American soldiers who have been sent over to the Middle East to fight Mr. Bush's WAR of EGO.
Mike, keep your head low, stay safe and return home to you wife and son and daughter as quickly as possible. Until then, you will be in our thoughts and prayers. May good luck be on your side, and may the Congress bring you home safely, before your term is up. Be well.
Peace to you all.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Today, a pet peeve of mine.
Have you ever been in a diner or restaurant and the waitress calls you hon? You know..."Here you go, hon." Or, "What can I get for you, hon?" The first couple of times you hear it, you're like, "She just called me hon. Is she flirting with me? Can I get a free dessert out of this?" After a while, or after a couple of visits to eateries where the waitress calls you "hon" you realizie it's just something people say instead of sir or madam. When it happens in a restaurant, I don't even give it a second thought. I figure the person is just trying to esablish a familiarity or show friendliness.
HOWEVER......
Recently, I've had dealings with an Insurance Agent who is young and, apparently, just starting out in the business. He often finishes his sentences with, "Okay Buddy?"
Buddy? What the freak is that? Are we friends? No. Do we hang out or something? No. So what makes you think it's okay to call me Buddy? It irks the shit out of me when people act in an unprofessional manner when trying to sell me something or do some kind of business with me. Buddy? Hey, Buddy THIS mofo. Okay? Do I call you dude? When you're trying to do business with me you may call me Sir, Mr. Tollerton, or Len. Buddy? I think NOT!
Which brings me to Pal. Several years ago, I did banking at Trustco Bank on Wolf Rd. in Colonie. There was a teller there by the name of James Vedder, who, while training, and then when he was working on his own, had the annoying habit of calling men Pal. Why are you calling me pal? Are you hoping we're going to establish a friendship and go get a couple of beers together? Are you looking for me to join your hoop team? (Unlikely)
Look, you are in a business where you are in front of the public representing a (supposedly) respectable comapny. How about trying to act in a professional manner and not call the nice customers Buddy, Pal, or Dude. You make yourself look like a dope or a dope smoker. Generally there's nothing wrong with that. Unfortunately, I'm NOT yourBuddy, I'm NOT your Pal, and if we're doing business, I'm definitely NOT Dude. Most of the time I AM Dude. Just not when we're doing business. Got it? Jesus Freakin' Christ, I'm going to smack the next assbag who calls me one of these "endearing" names when they're trying to sell me something or I'm attempting to do some banking.
On second thought, I think I'll just ask them to leave my house, or I'll turn around and leave their establishment so I don't have to put up with that. We ain't friends, we're not familiar, STOP doing it. You know that LEN IS RIGHT, don't you?
BEST OF LUCK AND A SPEEDY RETURN
Mike Wesoloski is a guy I was friends with when I was a teenager. Our sons are on the same bowling team. Mike is in the National Guard and his unit just found out a couple of weeks ago that they'll be shipping off to War in April. He will probably not return till February. His story is no different from the thousands of American soldiers who have been sent over to the Middle East to fight Mr. Bush's WAR of EGO.
Mike, keep your head low, stay safe and return home to you wife and son and daughter as quickly as possible. Until then, you will be in our thoughts and prayers. May good luck be on your side, and may the Congress bring you home safely, before your term is up. Be well.
Peace to you all.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
A BIRTHDAY NOTE, NCAA HOOP, AND WEEDS
People O'Mine:
Hey now! Len Is Right back here again to mention a couple of things that I let go and wanted to talk about.
First, a birthday. Last Friday night I was up to good friend Chuck's house to celebrate his 49th birthday. Chuck is the Edge of Darkness. Also attending was Roy the G. B. King and Chris the Dot Com Destroyer. Just a little poker and a party celebration on a TERRIBLE night weather-wise. Blinding snow storm in the Capital Region dumped about 16 inches on us and forced me and Roy to sleep at Chuck's. It was fun, though, and we played cards until around 3:00 a.m. This is strange for us, as I usually leave around 12:30 cause it's a 35-minute ride home. So anyway, Happy Birthday Chuck, and many happy returns. Next year we will be holding the Chuck Luce turns 50 poker tourney. Stay tuned.
THE NCAA HOOP TOURNEY AND BRACKET SHEETS
Folks, I gotta tell ya, I hate basketball. I used to be a big fan, but it's turned into a game for Me-First thugs and no more resembles the game I remember than does a tuna sandwich. So, it was with a completely apathetic, non-caring attitude that I greeted the NCAA tournament and the inevitable bracket sheet contests that many people play every year.
This was supposed to have been my second year in a row that I decided NOT to turn in a sheet for the contest. My reasons for not playing are as follows: I've never been close to cashing in 10 years of trying. I fucking DETEST hoop. I especially dislike the NBA (though I try to follow the progress of my cousin, Matt Carroll, who plays for the Charlotte Bobcats---and is having a very good year). I don't care who wins, who plays, who the stars are, which conference does best, and I don't bet the games.....again because I couldn't care less. I would sooner go off of a ski jump in Lake Placid and risk life and limb flying through the air, than watch a single hoop game or bet on which team happens to cover the spread.
MANHOOD INSULTED...
However, one of my closest friends decided that I was un-American and that I was, and I quote, "half a queer" for not getting into the contest. He doesn't understand how a guy doesn't want to follow college hoop and bet the games and get into the contest. And again, I had to hear about this 2nd hand. I love being called a queer behind my back. (No offense to any gay folks out there in the audience, who may be reading this, but it's like calling a white guy a nigger instead of a cracker) So, not liking my manhood questioned and playing into his BULLSHIT, I got into a contest, albeit run by someone else, that I could easily follow online.
The result so far? There were 208 entries into this particular contest and after Round 1 I was in 154th place. After Round 2, I was in a little better shape at 108th place, but definitely already out of any chance of getting in the money. I may have had a little more fun actually setting a $10 bill on fire and watching it burn, or making it into a paper airplane and seeing if I could fly it into my toilet.
My thanks to Joe Gunther for thinking of me and letting me into his contest at the last minute. To my other friends, I'd like to make something perfectly clear, so there is no mistake next year or anytime after that. I HATE BASKETBALL!!! Is that easily understood? Do you finally get the fact that I don't care who wins, who loses, or if every team has to forfeit because of rampant diarhhea. I don't wish to bet games, don't care who's playing and except for my cousins Matt and Pat Carroll, couldn't care less if the game was eliminated off the face of the earth, except that many inner city kids would have no sport to play.
Hey look, hoop is great exercise and a great sport to PLAY. I guess when I say that I hate hoop, I mean I will not follow it. When Julius Erving retired I lost all interest. And I can't conciously follow a sport where many of the elite collegians will one day become the Ron Artests and Allen Iversons of the NBA.
So, please don't bother me with basketball shit anymore. I am not interested. I will gamble on many things. But I've stopped sports betting because I really have no control over it, I SUCK at it, and truthfully, I would rather risk my money on things I DO have control over, like a hand of poker.
WEEDS
There is a show on Showtime that has been on for a couple of years called Weeds. It's about a woman, recently widowed, who has to become a pot dealer in her neighborhood to make ends meet and keep her house. I had to rent the DVD's of it because I don't have Showtime. Let me tell you folks, I think it's freakin' hilarious. I'm looking forward to renting the 2nd season, and I HIGHLY (no pun intended) recommend you check it out if you haven't seen it already. It stars the beautiful and sexy Mary Louise Parker along with the beautiful and sexy Elizabeth Perkins. Take my advice and watch it. I think you'll agree.
Until next time, my friends, please remember that LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Hey now! Len Is Right back here again to mention a couple of things that I let go and wanted to talk about.
First, a birthday. Last Friday night I was up to good friend Chuck's house to celebrate his 49th birthday. Chuck is the Edge of Darkness. Also attending was Roy the G. B. King and Chris the Dot Com Destroyer. Just a little poker and a party celebration on a TERRIBLE night weather-wise. Blinding snow storm in the Capital Region dumped about 16 inches on us and forced me and Roy to sleep at Chuck's. It was fun, though, and we played cards until around 3:00 a.m. This is strange for us, as I usually leave around 12:30 cause it's a 35-minute ride home. So anyway, Happy Birthday Chuck, and many happy returns. Next year we will be holding the Chuck Luce turns 50 poker tourney. Stay tuned.
THE NCAA HOOP TOURNEY AND BRACKET SHEETS
Folks, I gotta tell ya, I hate basketball. I used to be a big fan, but it's turned into a game for Me-First thugs and no more resembles the game I remember than does a tuna sandwich. So, it was with a completely apathetic, non-caring attitude that I greeted the NCAA tournament and the inevitable bracket sheet contests that many people play every year.
This was supposed to have been my second year in a row that I decided NOT to turn in a sheet for the contest. My reasons for not playing are as follows: I've never been close to cashing in 10 years of trying. I fucking DETEST hoop. I especially dislike the NBA (though I try to follow the progress of my cousin, Matt Carroll, who plays for the Charlotte Bobcats---and is having a very good year). I don't care who wins, who plays, who the stars are, which conference does best, and I don't bet the games.....again because I couldn't care less. I would sooner go off of a ski jump in Lake Placid and risk life and limb flying through the air, than watch a single hoop game or bet on which team happens to cover the spread.
MANHOOD INSULTED...
However, one of my closest friends decided that I was un-American and that I was, and I quote, "half a queer" for not getting into the contest. He doesn't understand how a guy doesn't want to follow college hoop and bet the games and get into the contest. And again, I had to hear about this 2nd hand. I love being called a queer behind my back. (No offense to any gay folks out there in the audience, who may be reading this, but it's like calling a white guy a nigger instead of a cracker) So, not liking my manhood questioned and playing into his BULLSHIT, I got into a contest, albeit run by someone else, that I could easily follow online.
The result so far? There were 208 entries into this particular contest and after Round 1 I was in 154th place. After Round 2, I was in a little better shape at 108th place, but definitely already out of any chance of getting in the money. I may have had a little more fun actually setting a $10 bill on fire and watching it burn, or making it into a paper airplane and seeing if I could fly it into my toilet.
My thanks to Joe Gunther for thinking of me and letting me into his contest at the last minute. To my other friends, I'd like to make something perfectly clear, so there is no mistake next year or anytime after that. I HATE BASKETBALL!!! Is that easily understood? Do you finally get the fact that I don't care who wins, who loses, or if every team has to forfeit because of rampant diarhhea. I don't wish to bet games, don't care who's playing and except for my cousins Matt and Pat Carroll, couldn't care less if the game was eliminated off the face of the earth, except that many inner city kids would have no sport to play.
Hey look, hoop is great exercise and a great sport to PLAY. I guess when I say that I hate hoop, I mean I will not follow it. When Julius Erving retired I lost all interest. And I can't conciously follow a sport where many of the elite collegians will one day become the Ron Artests and Allen Iversons of the NBA.
So, please don't bother me with basketball shit anymore. I am not interested. I will gamble on many things. But I've stopped sports betting because I really have no control over it, I SUCK at it, and truthfully, I would rather risk my money on things I DO have control over, like a hand of poker.
WEEDS
There is a show on Showtime that has been on for a couple of years called Weeds. It's about a woman, recently widowed, who has to become a pot dealer in her neighborhood to make ends meet and keep her house. I had to rent the DVD's of it because I don't have Showtime. Let me tell you folks, I think it's freakin' hilarious. I'm looking forward to renting the 2nd season, and I HIGHLY (no pun intended) recommend you check it out if you haven't seen it already. It stars the beautiful and sexy Mary Louise Parker along with the beautiful and sexy Elizabeth Perkins. Take my advice and watch it. I think you'll agree.
Until next time, my friends, please remember that LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
GET THE MASSAGE...LEN IS RIGHT
Hello my friends:
Today's post deals with an experience I enjoyed today. Back in October, my mother gave me a gift certificate for a local day spa because I was interested in getting a massage. I've never had a Swedish massage and have always been interested, having heard nothing but good things.
I went to Kimberly's in Latham. They are generally booked up and you have to make an appointment around 2-3 weeks in advance. So I did. Now first off, I've got to say that I don't know if I would have spent money on myself for this, at least, not before experiencing it. A 1-hour Swedish massage goes for $70. So, with some skepticism, because of the disparity in the cost of the massage, compared to what I make per hour, I made my way to Latham.
After filling out a questionnaire, I was led upstairs to the room I was going to use. The masseuse, Sierra, had me disrobe to my level of comfort(down to my underwear), and lay under the sheet and blanket. I put my face into the support ring, laying on my stomach. There was soothing New-Agey type of music playing to help with relaxation. The massage table had a heating pad and was nice and warm when I laid down. Sierra started with compressions, which is pushing down on the parts of your body she was going to be working on first, to prepare your skin tissue for the massage.
I'm not going to bore you with all of the details. She started with my back and neck, using a grape seed massage oil and then did the backs of my legs. I then turned over and she did my feet, leg fronts and arms and hands. The hour seemed to fly by and I enjoyed every minute of it. Afterward, the have you drink some water to aid in getting rid of any toxins that may have been released after a deep-tissue massage.
ADVICE FROM LEN IS RIGHT
I will tell you what. This was one of the most enjoyable experiences I've ever had that didn't involve sex, food, sports, or poker. I heartilly recommend spoiling yourself or a loved one with a total body massage. And no, guys, there was no "Happy Ending" offered. It was just your basic Swedish massage. But with Mothers Day, Father's Day approaching, and birthdays always on the horizon, I would definitely think about looking into spending the money for a massage.
Now, you can get massages for less money. Local independent massage therapists generally charge around $50-$60/hour. Also, there is the Center For Wellness, on Wolf Rd. in Colonie (right behind Pier 1 Imports), which is the school that many of the local massage therapists attend, where you can get a massage for $40. Realize that you are getting it from a person who is still in training.
I would also recommend that if you are going to have one, and you are a man, that you request a woman massage therapist. You don't want to feel all nervous because another guy is running his hands over your body. The woman I had was friendly, only spoke if I spoke, and very professional. And if you're the kind of guy who wouldn't even consider walking into a day spa because it seems girly or faggy, all I can tell you is that you are missing out. Personally, I don't know how I went without this kind of treatment for the first 43 years of my life. I'll be going back fairly soon, because that was very cool and I really enjoyed my time there. Kimberly's is a tad pretentious and up-scale, and it is a bit costly. But afterward you don't even think about that. You're just thinking about how good your body feels.
AND THAT, MY FRIENDS, IS THE BOTTOM LINE!
Get the massage. Spend some money on yourself. You'll be very glad you did. And besides, you have GOT TO KNOW that........LEN IS RIGHT.
Peace to you all.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Today's post deals with an experience I enjoyed today. Back in October, my mother gave me a gift certificate for a local day spa because I was interested in getting a massage. I've never had a Swedish massage and have always been interested, having heard nothing but good things.
I went to Kimberly's in Latham. They are generally booked up and you have to make an appointment around 2-3 weeks in advance. So I did. Now first off, I've got to say that I don't know if I would have spent money on myself for this, at least, not before experiencing it. A 1-hour Swedish massage goes for $70. So, with some skepticism, because of the disparity in the cost of the massage, compared to what I make per hour, I made my way to Latham.
After filling out a questionnaire, I was led upstairs to the room I was going to use. The masseuse, Sierra, had me disrobe to my level of comfort(down to my underwear), and lay under the sheet and blanket. I put my face into the support ring, laying on my stomach. There was soothing New-Agey type of music playing to help with relaxation. The massage table had a heating pad and was nice and warm when I laid down. Sierra started with compressions, which is pushing down on the parts of your body she was going to be working on first, to prepare your skin tissue for the massage.
I'm not going to bore you with all of the details. She started with my back and neck, using a grape seed massage oil and then did the backs of my legs. I then turned over and she did my feet, leg fronts and arms and hands. The hour seemed to fly by and I enjoyed every minute of it. Afterward, the have you drink some water to aid in getting rid of any toxins that may have been released after a deep-tissue massage.
ADVICE FROM LEN IS RIGHT
I will tell you what. This was one of the most enjoyable experiences I've ever had that didn't involve sex, food, sports, or poker. I heartilly recommend spoiling yourself or a loved one with a total body massage. And no, guys, there was no "Happy Ending" offered. It was just your basic Swedish massage. But with Mothers Day, Father's Day approaching, and birthdays always on the horizon, I would definitely think about looking into spending the money for a massage.
Now, you can get massages for less money. Local independent massage therapists generally charge around $50-$60/hour. Also, there is the Center For Wellness, on Wolf Rd. in Colonie (right behind Pier 1 Imports), which is the school that many of the local massage therapists attend, where you can get a massage for $40. Realize that you are getting it from a person who is still in training.
I would also recommend that if you are going to have one, and you are a man, that you request a woman massage therapist. You don't want to feel all nervous because another guy is running his hands over your body. The woman I had was friendly, only spoke if I spoke, and very professional. And if you're the kind of guy who wouldn't even consider walking into a day spa because it seems girly or faggy, all I can tell you is that you are missing out. Personally, I don't know how I went without this kind of treatment for the first 43 years of my life. I'll be going back fairly soon, because that was very cool and I really enjoyed my time there. Kimberly's is a tad pretentious and up-scale, and it is a bit costly. But afterward you don't even think about that. You're just thinking about how good your body feels.
AND THAT, MY FRIENDS, IS THE BOTTOM LINE!
Get the massage. Spend some money on yourself. You'll be very glad you did. And besides, you have GOT TO KNOW that........LEN IS RIGHT.
Peace to you all.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Thursday, March 01, 2007
2 BIRTHDAYS AND AN OBSERVATION
Greetings my friends:
Today is March 1st and I have done the unthinkable by not posting yesterday to wish my wife, the lovely Patty, a very Happy Birthday. I won't mention her age, because she hates her birthday. Patty, being a glass-half-empty type of person, believes she is old and washed up and hasn't accomplished anything in her life. Never mind that she has a Master's Degree, has sustained a marriage for 20 years, has 2 great kids, and nice friends. Anyway...Happy Birthday Hon, I love you very much. Anyone wishing to send the Lovely Patty a birthday greeting, may email her at peatea63@yahoo.com
Today being March 1st, I'd also like to send birthday greetings out to good friend Kevin Koehler, who turns 53 today. Have a great day, Kev. I know you're looking forward to the Vegas trip in a couple of weeks.
A LEN IS RIGHT COMMENT ON RELIGION AND SPIRITUALITY
I've recently been doing some reading on Buddhism. For some time now I have been interested in why Buddhists seem to be at peace more than others, why Asian religions seem so mysterious, and why these people seem to live longer. Risking a derisive attitude from those who know me to be a Pagan Non-believer, I bought the book Buddhism For Dummies. While I did not get all my questions answered, I believe I have hit upon some truths and some insight into what it is with man and his spiritual beliefs.
First off, I just want to explain what I'm getting as the central point of Buddhism. It is a philosophy of kindness and compassion. And I believe that the main way to Enlightenment is through Meditation. This means Introspection and trying to figure out the truths of your own soul by looking inside yourself and trying to identify flaws and make changes. That's not really a full explanation, but it will serve as one for now.
While reading this book and learning what the whole thing is about, I realized a couple of things. First off, it seems to me that in questions of man and Religion or Spirituality, that the majority of people NEED, for some reason, a focal point for their beliefs. They need to believe that they can sit near Jesus in Heaven. They need to believe that God actually spoke to Moses, and that the Torah is THE Bible. They need to believe that Allah is to be praised. They need a teacher, a guru, a priest or rabbi to guide them through their lives and give them something to focus on to make it through their day.
It seems to me that another word for Focal Point would be CRUTCH. We all seem to need guidance from others. We seem to need something tangible to see or touch, or to grab on to so we have someone or something to blame if we fail or stumble along the path.
WHAT'S THE MESSAGE?
The message is....and I'm taking this from the idea of Buddhist meditation practices, that to find your answers, to find clarity, a person needs to spend some time looking inside themselves. Introspection and complete honesty with yourself is how you will find these answers. You don't NEED a bible or a god. You, my friends, HAVE IT ALL right inside of yourselves. The Power, or the God, or the Spirit is inside of you and it doesn't need the help of some Born-Again evangelist or a guru, priest or shamen to come out.
If you need an answer, do not look for it from others. Others have their own agendas, their own problems. By being brutally honest with ourselves and seeking the answer from inside ourselves, we eliminate the need for a Crutch. We are all very strong, though we may not know it. It's not about the money, our status-symbol jobs, our social stratus, etc..., it's about peace and happiness within our own selves. WE are the power. We just need to learn how to harvest that power and put that personal power to use in the best way.
GO...SEEK...FIND. BUT DON'T LOOK TOO FAR, BECAUSE IT'S RIGHT INSIDE OF YOU.
That's all for now. Trust me, LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Today is March 1st and I have done the unthinkable by not posting yesterday to wish my wife, the lovely Patty, a very Happy Birthday. I won't mention her age, because she hates her birthday. Patty, being a glass-half-empty type of person, believes she is old and washed up and hasn't accomplished anything in her life. Never mind that she has a Master's Degree, has sustained a marriage for 20 years, has 2 great kids, and nice friends. Anyway...Happy Birthday Hon, I love you very much. Anyone wishing to send the Lovely Patty a birthday greeting, may email her at peatea63@yahoo.com
Today being March 1st, I'd also like to send birthday greetings out to good friend Kevin Koehler, who turns 53 today. Have a great day, Kev. I know you're looking forward to the Vegas trip in a couple of weeks.
A LEN IS RIGHT COMMENT ON RELIGION AND SPIRITUALITY
I've recently been doing some reading on Buddhism. For some time now I have been interested in why Buddhists seem to be at peace more than others, why Asian religions seem so mysterious, and why these people seem to live longer. Risking a derisive attitude from those who know me to be a Pagan Non-believer, I bought the book Buddhism For Dummies. While I did not get all my questions answered, I believe I have hit upon some truths and some insight into what it is with man and his spiritual beliefs.
First off, I just want to explain what I'm getting as the central point of Buddhism. It is a philosophy of kindness and compassion. And I believe that the main way to Enlightenment is through Meditation. This means Introspection and trying to figure out the truths of your own soul by looking inside yourself and trying to identify flaws and make changes. That's not really a full explanation, but it will serve as one for now.
While reading this book and learning what the whole thing is about, I realized a couple of things. First off, it seems to me that in questions of man and Religion or Spirituality, that the majority of people NEED, for some reason, a focal point for their beliefs. They need to believe that they can sit near Jesus in Heaven. They need to believe that God actually spoke to Moses, and that the Torah is THE Bible. They need to believe that Allah is to be praised. They need a teacher, a guru, a priest or rabbi to guide them through their lives and give them something to focus on to make it through their day.
It seems to me that another word for Focal Point would be CRUTCH. We all seem to need guidance from others. We seem to need something tangible to see or touch, or to grab on to so we have someone or something to blame if we fail or stumble along the path.
WHAT'S THE MESSAGE?
The message is....and I'm taking this from the idea of Buddhist meditation practices, that to find your answers, to find clarity, a person needs to spend some time looking inside themselves. Introspection and complete honesty with yourself is how you will find these answers. You don't NEED a bible or a god. You, my friends, HAVE IT ALL right inside of yourselves. The Power, or the God, or the Spirit is inside of you and it doesn't need the help of some Born-Again evangelist or a guru, priest or shamen to come out.
If you need an answer, do not look for it from others. Others have their own agendas, their own problems. By being brutally honest with ourselves and seeking the answer from inside ourselves, we eliminate the need for a Crutch. We are all very strong, though we may not know it. It's not about the money, our status-symbol jobs, our social stratus, etc..., it's about peace and happiness within our own selves. WE are the power. We just need to learn how to harvest that power and put that personal power to use in the best way.
GO...SEEK...FIND. BUT DON'T LOOK TOO FAR, BECAUSE IT'S RIGHT INSIDE OF YOU.
That's all for now. Trust me, LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
Friday, February 23, 2007
LT. TED ABRIEL DIES ON DUTY
Greetings My Friends:
I just got back from the wake of Albany Firefighter, Lt. Ted Abriel. If you are from Albany, then you know about his death because the story has been all over the local news for the last week. Ted was a Lieutenant and member of the elite Rescue Squad in the Albany Fire Dept. Monday, while fighting his second fire of the day, and after climbing 6 flights of stairs with 100lbs. of equipment on his back, trying to get people out of a burning buiding, Ted suffered a massive heart attack and died at the scene. Our thoughts and condolences go out to Ted's family, friends, and brother firefighters. It is one of the harsh realities of the occupation he chose. Sometimes a guy doesn't come home from work.
I graduated high school (Christian Brothers Academy Class of '81) with Ted. In all honesty, I didn't know him that well and hadn't seen or spoke to him since we graduated. From all accounts, this guy lived a life well spent. Hero Firefighter, husband, father to four kids, Little League coach, he also organized a huge fundraising effort after 9-1-1. Who knows how many people he was personally responsible for saving in his 22 years in the Department?
I just wanted to write a little in regard to this thing. First off, once again, I need to state an old theme. Life is fleeting. In the blink of an eye your life can change, for better or worse, completely altering your sense of self, your way of life, your very existence. You can be here one minute and gone the next. Ted spent the better part of his life giving to others, living a life that was noble and necessary. He gave of himself, putting others' lives ahead of his own, knowing that some day he may well not go home. People that do this kind of work for any period of time have a true calling and are driven. A person doesn't spend this kind of time in this job just hoping to get a pension. The world needs more people like Ted. Maybe if we all were to move away from the "me-me-me" type of personal philosophy, the world would have a better chance of surviving. How many professional athletes think that what they do actually matters? Self-important rich guys who think they help people with their job.
Another theme I'm fond of carping on is Making a Positive Difference in People's Lives. Ted obviously did that. If he was a Viking, he would now be in Valhalla, because he died in battle. If he was a Buddhist, he may have reached Nirvana when he died because he was doing compassionate, selfless work. It seems cold comfort to his wife and kids to hear that. They are without their husband and father. They would probably give up every kind word and condolence to have him back for another day, you know?
So, one more time, my friends. The 2 most important things you can do in your short time on this rock. You can try to live a life making a positive impact on those around you and those you may deal with on a daily basis. Did you leave a lasting impression on people who knew you? In Ted's case, he left his mark on not only his family and friends, but on every person he helped, the families of those he helped and the buildings he went into to rescue people. The other important thing is to remember how fragile and fleeting life can be. Make sure the people around you know how you feel about them. Make them know they are special. Make sure they really know. You or they may be gone the next day and you're left kicking yourself for not letting them know what you felt.
I salute you, Ted. You spent your life well, short as it was. You accomplished more in a short time than many of us ever will with double the time.
Time marches on, as they say, and it waits for no man.....And still, life goes on. I implore you to LIVE it, not waste it. Thus endeth today's lesson. My friends, wrap yourself around the fact that LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
I just got back from the wake of Albany Firefighter, Lt. Ted Abriel. If you are from Albany, then you know about his death because the story has been all over the local news for the last week. Ted was a Lieutenant and member of the elite Rescue Squad in the Albany Fire Dept. Monday, while fighting his second fire of the day, and after climbing 6 flights of stairs with 100lbs. of equipment on his back, trying to get people out of a burning buiding, Ted suffered a massive heart attack and died at the scene. Our thoughts and condolences go out to Ted's family, friends, and brother firefighters. It is one of the harsh realities of the occupation he chose. Sometimes a guy doesn't come home from work.
I graduated high school (Christian Brothers Academy Class of '81) with Ted. In all honesty, I didn't know him that well and hadn't seen or spoke to him since we graduated. From all accounts, this guy lived a life well spent. Hero Firefighter, husband, father to four kids, Little League coach, he also organized a huge fundraising effort after 9-1-1. Who knows how many people he was personally responsible for saving in his 22 years in the Department?
I just wanted to write a little in regard to this thing. First off, once again, I need to state an old theme. Life is fleeting. In the blink of an eye your life can change, for better or worse, completely altering your sense of self, your way of life, your very existence. You can be here one minute and gone the next. Ted spent the better part of his life giving to others, living a life that was noble and necessary. He gave of himself, putting others' lives ahead of his own, knowing that some day he may well not go home. People that do this kind of work for any period of time have a true calling and are driven. A person doesn't spend this kind of time in this job just hoping to get a pension. The world needs more people like Ted. Maybe if we all were to move away from the "me-me-me" type of personal philosophy, the world would have a better chance of surviving. How many professional athletes think that what they do actually matters? Self-important rich guys who think they help people with their job.
Another theme I'm fond of carping on is Making a Positive Difference in People's Lives. Ted obviously did that. If he was a Viking, he would now be in Valhalla, because he died in battle. If he was a Buddhist, he may have reached Nirvana when he died because he was doing compassionate, selfless work. It seems cold comfort to his wife and kids to hear that. They are without their husband and father. They would probably give up every kind word and condolence to have him back for another day, you know?
So, one more time, my friends. The 2 most important things you can do in your short time on this rock. You can try to live a life making a positive impact on those around you and those you may deal with on a daily basis. Did you leave a lasting impression on people who knew you? In Ted's case, he left his mark on not only his family and friends, but on every person he helped, the families of those he helped and the buildings he went into to rescue people. The other important thing is to remember how fragile and fleeting life can be. Make sure the people around you know how you feel about them. Make them know they are special. Make sure they really know. You or they may be gone the next day and you're left kicking yourself for not letting them know what you felt.
I salute you, Ted. You spent your life well, short as it was. You accomplished more in a short time than many of us ever will with double the time.
Time marches on, as they say, and it waits for no man.....And still, life goes on. I implore you to LIVE it, not waste it. Thus endeth today's lesson. My friends, wrap yourself around the fact that LEN IS RIGHT.
I am,
Len Tollerton
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